Memories of Ricky :: You will always be remembered

I first met Rick when he was 13. It was his first time he had been allowed out of Berg's house, his first time to meet young people like himself. He seemed so shy, quiet, lacking in confidence, but thoughtful, tender, and someone easy to talk to.

The next time I met him was years later in Portugal, 1997. It was a new and strange world I had entered—cut off from everything and everyone. It was my first time to meet Zerby, his mother, and to live in the environment that he had grown up in all his life.

Rick was born just a few days before me, and as a child I took this as a badge of honor—that we were the same age, the same sun sign.

During the time that I was living in the same compound with him in Portugal, I could see him struggling, he was not happy being kept busy doing odd jobs around the house.

It was obvious that his mother wanted to keep him there so she could control him. She didn't see the potential that he had as a person. She didn't see him as the man that he had now become. She didn't try to find out what his dreams and aspirations were, to help him find his own potential, to let him become the man that he had grown to be. He was still clearly her little boy, someone who she thought she could manipulate and tell what to do, what to think, and what to feel.

He finally took a stand, he decided to leave. I also had decided to leave, so understood in some way what he was going through during that time.

The last time I talked with Rick, it was on the phone, the Friday before the terrible tragedy. In that one hour conversation I discovered more about who Rick really was then the entire two-and-a-half years I had lived with him. We were finally able to talk freely and openly without fear, without all the weirdness of the Family and the fronts we had to put up to protect ourselves.

That's why it hurt so deeply when I heard he was gone—I would never get another email, another call from him, I would never see him again. I can only take comfort in the memories I have of him that will always remain in my heart and I cherish every moment that I knew him.