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Getting Through : Dealing


from atbrussels - Wednesday, September 27, 2006
accessed 904 times

I would like to know if other people have had problems with alcohol and how they have dealt with and overcome this problem.

I have major problems with alcohol but want and need to change this habit. I do not drink every day or absolutely need one however once I start drinking, I cannot stop. This has posed many problems for me, problems with friends for example them having to listen endlessly to stories of my youth, having frequent blackouts and showing my brother who is living with me at the moment a far from good example.

I work full time and go to Night University, I would say that I am a hard worker and am for the most part responsible, I am a control freak and hate talking about my past until I start drinking that is, then it is terrible and I start talking about my messed up childhood, sexual abuse I suffered, generally stuff that I would not even dream to say. Unfortunately this happens much too often and I hate myself for it. The next day I have feelings of guilt.

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from atbrussels
Thursday, October 12, 2006 - 00:05


Apologies for the very late reply, I had exams so had to concentrate on that- thanks for your all your words of advice, I appreciate it!

I started seeing a counseler which did me good but unfortunately I wasn't able to continue- I guess I should hold off drinking till I come to terms with my past - hopefully I will have the force of character to do it.

(reply to this comment)

from Rain Child
Friday, September 29, 2006 - 06:54

I had a weird time for a while, when I was feeling alone in the world and one of my good friends who I'd lived with in the Family had suddenly died. I worked at a bar, and the boss was always trying to get us to drink, but I had to be very careful, because if I ever became drunk I started crying uncontrollably.(And THAT was embarrassing) It was like my depression was hidden so deeply I didn't know it was there, but it came out if I drank. At that time I was much more comfortable with party drugs, which never made me feel depressed or out of control.

My next weird experience with alcohol was my long relationship with an alcoholic. Seeing what it was doing to him kept me very sober. It basically destroyed every aspect of his life, because he absolutely could not stop once he started drinking. Pretty soon he was drinking bourbon all day, from the moment he got out of bed. He couldn't function unless he was drinking. He tried to quit many times, but because he was in denial about how bad his problem was, he'd keep saying, "I'll quit tomorrow."

The only thing that finally snapped him out of it was me leaving him. Now he doesn't dare go near a drink and he has been sober for about a year and a half. He hopes to be able to drink sociably again someday, but considering how his alcoholism had almost killed him, (He was having hallucinations & seizures) I think it will be a very dangerous thing for him to ever try drinking again.

Good news is, I can drink now without fear that I'll burst into tears or tell my life story. I think you probably really need to have a good talk with someone, that's why it's trying to spill out. Now that my life is back in a calm and happy place, a drink is simply a way to unwind.
(reply to this comment)
from been there
Friday, September 29, 2006 - 06:36

When I realised I had a problem I made a very firm decision that it was no longer going to be a problem. I decided on six months and didn't have a drink during that time. One reason why I drank is to get rid of the pain and by not drinking I had to face it. Now I am not saying that is why you are drinking but it may be something you want to look at. By waiting you may be able to examine why you are drinking and be able to go from there. I do drink now but never when I feel like I have to have one. I have a limit and I never go past it.
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from AndyH
Thursday, September 28, 2006 - 21:52

Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5(Agree/Disagree?)
Yeah, I've had some problems with alcohol. It runs in my family, but it's always much worse during times that I'm going through things. This is why I've always figured that the alcoholism was just a symptom of a much greater problem. Maybe this is the same with you? Maybe rather than addressing the alcoholism you should address these things that are bothering you, that you only allow to surface when you're drunk? Maybe your urge to get drunk is your way of getting to that state where you allow yourself to feel?

I've talked to a counselor about drinking and he said that he didn't think that I needed to be in a program. That those programs are for people who absolutely cannot quit under their own will power. He thought that I had the will power, I agreed.

The bottom line is: If it's interfering with who you want to be, try to stop. If you find you can't stop, get help.
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From Removed
Saturday, September 30, 2006, 00:01

[Removed at author's request] (reply to this comment
from oddman
Thursday, September 28, 2006 - 18:10

There are two reasons for drinking: one is, when you are thirsty, to cure it: the other, when you are not thirsty, to prevent it....

Prevention is better than cure.

~~ Thomas L. Peacock ~~

When I first started drinking, alcohol made me depressed. I also couldn't control myself, and frequently ended up blind drunk, not knowing how I ever got home.

At the time I was drinking mainly socially, with a horde of Aussie and Kiwi co-workers, who made sure you kept up beer pace. "Oi boy, still on yer thirrrd beerr? And drinking uv a glass ar ya? Oi bartender, get thus poor boy a pitcher!"

My solution was switching to hard alcohol. Whiskey, Bourbon, Vodka, Tequila, Spiritus, Rum, Absinthe. People have no clue how strong your mix is, and you get away with drinking slow if you like it neat or on the rocks. You might get away with keeping a chaser on the table as well.

I also made an effort to constantly stay in conversation with other people, normally older, better educated, and opiniated. I'd let them do most of the talking, and practice listening. By doing so I avoided saying things I'd regret, and kept myself busy, slowing down my drinking pace.

Drinking by the bar or standing out on the floor helps. You stay on your feet, so you know when you can't handle more. If seated at a table, you could utilize the mens room, or step out for a cigarette, and check if you still have your feet beneath you.

After a while my tolerance level went up, so I wouldn't get drunk as easily. I also knew when I was getting drunk and couldn't take more.

Now, I might be an alcoholic. I drink every day, and quite often on my own. But it isn't often that I lose self control. The depression doesn't hit, unless I start drinking determined to be depressed.
(reply to this comment)
from Non-thinker
Thursday, September 28, 2006 - 17:46


My first problem with Alcohol is I can't get enough of it...
My second problem with Alcohol is the strain on my wallet.
My third problem with Alcohol is the wide variety of women in my bed the morning after.
My fourth problem with Alcohol is the odd headache curable only by Alcohol.
My fifth problem with Alcohol is the name it earns me for being a fun-loving crazy party animal, dancing to tubthumping, el capitan, and tequila chants.

My first problem with my girlfriend is I've had enough of her...
My second problem with my girlfriend is the strain on my wallet.
My third problem with my girlfriend is the limited variety of woman in my bed the morning after.
My fourth problem with my girlfriend is the chronic headaches temporarily curable by Alcohol.
My fifth problem with my girlfriend is the name she earns me for being a boring hermit, never partying, and having gay boyband music in my car.

And the winner is, Tag team Tequila and Captain Morgan.
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