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Getting Through : Dealing

Whats all of it for?

from MM - Friday, July 09, 2004
accessed 1331 times

I do not know what made me leave, I guess the World was looking for me and I was looking for the World.

Days and months, then years went by and my parents never made a move to leave The Family. I was determined to get out when I became 16 and so I did, now 10 years have gone by and I must say one thing; a question to all you out there who are in this "System": Do you feel happy? Do you feel satisfied?

Hell, I hated most of the things that were done to us, I was Mr. Victor for as long as I remember, I hated the Uncles & Aunties, I tell you I think I could actually kill some of them with my bare hands, but now I've come to a conclusion.

We were created for this, and even though this "cult" is "so bad" we will never be free from it all, we are like little wolves taken out of the wild and kept in captivity and taught to be dogs, but we can't take it cause its in our blood, we are sons and daughters of freedom. Pure blood.

Hell, I think that some who have the make for it and the desire should make a "cult" called "Children of the Free God" Ha! That would piss some people off.

By the way I never found the World, but it got me. (Sorry for the writing)


(Q: Anyone know the reason for life? Hehe!!)

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from Dr.4_Shure
Thursday, July 15, 2004 - 19:29

Happy? Yes! Satisfied? Life could always be better, just get on with it!
It sounds to me like you still have some issues to deal with!
(reply to this comment)
from Depends on my mood!
Thursday, July 15, 2004 - 10:25


Sex_drugs_rock in roll_food


(reply to this comment)

From exister
Thursday, July 15, 2004, 13:26

Keep your shirt on, Kerouac.(reply to this comment
Tuesday, July 20, 2004, 11:33

No shirts in heaven mate, Jack.(reply to this comment
from Baxter
Tuesday, July 13, 2004 - 17:01

Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5(Agree/Disagree?)

I think the truth of the matter is that searching for the ultimate meaning of life will in all likelihood end in one of two conclusions: either you will end up disillusioned, or else you will supplant your desire for truth with another substitute, such as the one provided by our parents, the one they themselves were so satisfied with. I don't believe in the notion of absolute truth, and even if there is such a thing the possibility of a human being resolving it is not one that I find particularly probable. If you left the family because you thought that doing so would make you happy, satisfied or otherwise, then I imagine it was unlikely that you would not be disappointed.

fulfilment in life is inevitably a matter of personal disposition. I agree that a part of our characters are inevitably influenced by our childhoods. We were raised to believe in a supposedly infallible cause, and we were taught to be ready to die for that cause. compensating for such a void is probably impossible.
(reply to this comment)

From Joe H
Tuesday, July 13, 2004, 17:31

Average visitor agreement is 1 out of 5(Agree/Disagree?)

"it was unlikely that you would not be disappointed." This is more of a usage question than a criticism, but are British people more likely to use double negatives the way Baxter constantly does?

(reply to this comment

From Shackled
Thursday, July 15, 2004, 18:08

Average visitor agreement is 3 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 3 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 3 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 3 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 3 out of 5(
I'm also curious. Baxter is a very intelligent but I have trouble understanding what he's saying. Maybe it's just me. (reply to this comment
From Shackled
Thursday, July 15, 2004, 21:27

Average visitor agreement is 1 out of 5(

Gettings a thumbs down is just awesome. Who has that kind of time?(reply to this comment

From Shackled
Monday, July 19, 2004, 23:28

Average visitor agreement is 3 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 3 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 3 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 3 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 3 out of 5(
Can I get one more? (reply to this comment
From Joe's Alter Ego
Thursday, July 15, 2004, 14:31


Look everybody! See how smart I am? I'm more educated than all you other schmucks and I will express my disdain for those who have not had as great an education as I have, until I break out with acne. (Ooops...too late!)

And, furthermore, to all you assholes who tell me "it's easier to tear down than it is to build up," I say, "That's the whole fuckin' reason I do it--because it's easier!" I can't be bothered to have to come up with something nice to say. So I will generalize and belittle to my heart's content and there's not a damn thing you can do about it!

So there. [insert erect middle finger here]

(reply to this comment

From Jerseygirl
Thursday, July 15, 2004, 16:25

Reminds me of a new non-fiction book about all the different ways to give the finger. i.e. "The Viagra"--use your imagination. (reply to this comment
From Joe H
Thursday, July 15, 2004, 15:20


You're reading too much into my question (yes, it was a question). I don't particularly care for Baxter's constant usage of double negatives, but I'm willing to accept that it may be a Britishism. That's what I was trying to find out. Considering how many other comments I've made that were genuinely nasty, I find it odd that you would latch onto this one. That being said, you impersonation of me, while hyperbolic, is actually pretty funny and close to home. Finally! Someone who understands me! Are you single? (reply to this comment

From Joe's Alter Ego
Thursday, July 15, 2004, 15:42


I wasn't latching on to this one as much as taking advantage of the opportunity to crawl into your mind.

Glad to know I hit the nail on the head. You become more transparent by the day.

Next step: Tackle Joe's I-am-so-not-gay complex.(reply to this comment

from exister
Monday, July 12, 2004 - 14:41

Average visitor agreement is 1 out of 5(Agree/Disagree?)
Get some therapy.

And oh yeah, you are being excessively verbally dramatic, but if you must know what it is all for: humping legs.
(reply to this comment)
From banal_commentator
Tuesday, July 13, 2004, 05:56

So I've been right all along! (reply to this comment
from heywood jablome
Monday, July 12, 2004 - 07:14

lifes a bitch and then you die, so fuck it all and lets get high.
(reply to this comment)
from Mika
Monday, July 12, 2004 - 04:27

Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5(Agree/Disagree?)
A thousand different people will give you a thousand different answers to what the meaning of life is. Some will be profound, some mundane, but they will all be what that individual has learned holds meaning for themselves. Like you, I also left at 16, and have been out in the "world" for about 10 years now. Luckily, I have found a job I love, a few very close friends, and have settled into what would be considered a pretty ideal life. I may not understand your article clearly, but you seem to suggest that we can never be free from the Family's influence in our lives. I can agree that it is an integral part of our past, and whether we like or not, we have to accept it as what makes us, uniquely us. However, I do believe it's possible to be completely free of it's influence. I personally consider my life to have started at 16, anything before that becoming faded memory. Despite the trauma and hurt I experienced, I made a resolution somewhere along the line that I would not allow it to interfere with my new life. I decided to become informed of the myriad ways of thinking that are out here, then proceed to decide for myself what my morals should be. To answer the question though, yes, I do feel happy. And yes, I am satisfied. The reason being that I consider the future limitless, the possibilities endless, and the choices before me are just that-CHOICES. This means I can determine which path I want to take every step of the way, weighing options, determining outcomes, then reaping the consequences or rewards of those choices. We were not, like you say, created for a lifetime of existence in the Family. Disillusionment and disappointment can be found everywhere, whether in the Family or not. It's up to you to channel your energy towards creating the environment you want for yourself. Perhaps you think too much, or are searching too hard for that perfect world. The secret (or meaning) of life doesn't need to be earth shattering. It can be as simple as the satisfaction of knowing that somewhere within yourself you found the courage to break from a life that you didn't choose, then struggling to survive in a world that doesn't give you a break. Having made it thus far despite the odds makes you a survivor in every sense of the word. To know that people like you and me are out here, not only surviving, but thriving, holds great life meaning. Don't you agree?
(reply to this comment)
From Phoenixkidd
Tuesday, December 07, 2004, 15:07

Why does life have to have meaning/meanings? IT's just part of a conspiracy by religious fanatics, kings and cult leaders that make one feel they must conform to a set agenda in life, therefore giving their life some meaning. This mind set, then creates an underlying statement to yourself and to the world that you are worth something. Puleez there have been approxiamately 70 billion people that have walked the face of this earth, the fact that any God or some eternal being really cares about a single human being in order to bring them to a life of nirvana or heaven if they serve him is just one selfish, anal and mircromanaging SOB!!!! Who cares?! (reply to this comment

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