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Getting Through : Creative Writing

If I Could

from Kyla - Friday, June 15, 2007
accessed 799 times


If I could sing
my voice would weave through notes
written by genius hands, in harmonic perfection

If I could dance
my feet would leap and prance
blessed with beauty of form matched by flawless precision

If I could paint
my brush would craft a world
where your exquisite heart is my sole reality

If I could sculpt
our love would never die
my hands would carve our tangled forms into every stone

If I could dream
my heart would never break
because our reality would surpass any dream

If I could trust
Id take your heart and run
never asking for proof of your love or loyalties

If I could cry
my tears would wash away
all our mistakes, forgetting every disappointment

If I could lie
Id tell you Im okay
And force myself further into this alien faade

If I could end
all fear and accept that
were only human, I would admit fault and forgive

If I could be
the woman you deserve
I would love myself enough to never let you go

If I could stay
Id wrap you in my arms
And never let you know how deeply I am damaged

If I could love
Id watch you walk away
And recompense my pain with the thought of your freedom

If I could say
how much I adore you
Id pen beauty instead of this mediocrity

11 June 2007


Reader's comments on this article

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from madly
Sunday, June 17, 2007 - 20:33

(Agree/Disagree?)
It seems there is much more depth to this site lately and so much talent. I am loving it.
(reply to this comment)
From live_fast-die_young
Tuesday, July 10, 2007, 01:39

Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5(Agree/Disagree?)
But don't you see it, Madly? From what I have seen, there has been a whole turnover in the "regulars" of this site, as the original members moved on (Take that, those who say this site is for embittered thumb-suckers!) and were replaced by a new, and might I add, confused voice. Too embarrassed to be honest, not hurt enough to cry, they just spouted nonsense.
Till you came along! :-D You, and a few others who share your honesty, have showed others it's alright to speak without embarrassment. I am loving YOU!

(reply to this comment
From afflick
Thursday, July 19, 2007, 12:59

(Agree/Disagree?)

While its true that newer members to this site tend to do most of the posting/commenting, there are many of us who have been "around" for years (myself for five years and I believe Kyla as well) who peruse articles regularly and occasionally post.

(reply to this comment

From madly
Wednesday, July 11, 2007, 20:20

(Agree/Disagree?)
Awwww I have liked you ever since the day you shared your wine with me. Remember? ;)(reply to this comment
From live_fast-die_young
Tuesday, July 17, 2007, 06:48

Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5(Agree/Disagree?)
I do. And your reminder has reminded me of something I thought of posting once. It's hardly worth its own article as it's old, so I'll post it here. Cheers.

A Note to Self

I have just read my own palm. Inbetween the hills and lines there is a broken, stuttering story: a turned-on-it's-head story, a Jack and Jill story that some bad DJ got ahold of, so now a certain tumble is repeated so many times you become dizzy with the effort of listening. A child raised by strangers, taught fear, stolen from. An accidental spark starts a heart fire too early in life, burns bridges underfoot so the child nearly drowns. A rescuing! A growing-up too soon. A cold strength. Still that intrinsic fear leaned young. Ah well, at least a future. A love of literature and medicine. An analytical mind. A protective square placed auspiciously over fate. Hope.

There it is. All the starts and stops, all the convolutions, the U-turns and pit-stops and rusted signposts; all the inexplicable fear of blind corners and strangers.

First impressions are usually wrong. First comes the sense of loss. A great sadness like a raincloud in which a memory is gathering. My parents sitting crumpled on the edge of a bed, crying out their regrets to me, emploring forgiveness for their weakness and their mistakes. Each tear that falls fills me with a tiny drop of impotent rage. Each admission of guilt steals my anger and replaces my heart with a lump of coal, and a vague wish to be someplace else. Reading a book, perhaps. Yes, reading. The cloud bursts and I'm alone with my upturned palm which is mostly a history, a past, and not really a future.

Second impressions last longer. An anger, a great anger at my own weakness. A need to kick something. A sheepish admission of an inclination towards quackery and psuedo science. A recomposure. A straightening of the spine and limbs. A determination.

Third impressions are hardly impressions. They are well thought-out, balanced and emotion free. I walk purposefully to the kitchen. This is the right move, I know. At the very least it buys me time. A reaching for dark bottles, a twist of a corkscrew, a melodic POP! which is the opening note to a symphony of oblivion.

Just before complete absentia, a pause. A hiccough of dark humour. A note to self: "I have died twice in my lifetime. There is nothing left but living to do." Begin symphony.

(reply to this comment
From madly
Wednesday, July 18, 2007, 02:57

(Agree/Disagree?)
Boy would I love to take a spin around your mind, girl. This is exactly what I was referring to in my first comment above. Writing, like yours, keeps me coming back to this site. Silly debates and arguments... meh, that I can do with out. Insights into a person, which allows me the ability of viewing life, as they see it, this I deem worthy of my time.
(reply to this comment
From *shiver*
Tuesday, July 17, 2007, 22:15

(
Agree/Disagree?)

I love it. (reply to this comment

From vix
Tuesday, July 17, 2007, 10:07

(Agree/Disagree?)

Loved it! Nothing left but living to do. What a profound thought.

(reply to this comment

From live_fast-die_young
Thursday, July 26, 2007, 06:32

(Agree/Disagree?)
Thanx vix...(reply to this comment
From Samuel
Tuesday, July 10, 2007, 04:19

Average visitor agreement is 1 out of 5(Agree/Disagree?)

Yeah, Madly. The comments on this site over the past year have been replaced with a new, rather confused at times, voice. But you're the one who's showed me that if I can just overcome the embarrassment and speak from my heart, I feel a lot better.(reply to this comment

From live_fast-die_young
Tuesday, July 17, 2007, 06:53

(Agree/Disagree?)
No! NO! that's not what I meant! The collective "voice" is fine. It's the newer posting members that are confused. Never mind.(reply to this comment
From Say what???
Tuesday, July 10, 2007, 07:38

Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5(
Agree/Disagree?)
LFDY: "...replaced by a new, and might I add, confused voice".
Samuel: "...replaced with a new, rather confused at times, voice."

LFDY: "showed others it's alright to speak without embarrassment."
Samuel: "...overcome the embarrassment and speak from my heart"

I think you're confusing 'speaking from the heart' with 'rehashing what someone else has already said'.

Please tell me you did that on purpose.(reply to this comment
From Samuel
Tuesday, July 10, 2007, 18:03

Average visitor agreement is 1 out of 5(Agree/Disagree?)

No, that is how I felt before Live Fast Die Young made her comment. I felt that if she could tell Madly how much she has helped, that I should do the same.

For one thing, she doesn't prejudge me. I feel I can be myself when I'm talking to her. She doesn't talk down to me, tell me I'm stupid or an idiot just because she disagrees with something I say. She actually tries to be helpful. And although I rarely can understand all the long philosophical arguements that she makes on this site, and I realize she doesn't expect me to, I know that it is helpful to many other people who enjoy that kind of thing.(reply to this comment

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