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Getting Through : Creative Writing

Prophet Juice

from Beets - Tuesday, January 27, 2004
accessed 1237 times

Okay, so maybe this lacks originality and so on. And I'm sure that there are a million things wrong with it. I wrote this ages ago when the whole Vandari thing was first going around and I've been kind of not wanting to post it because there's already tons of stuff out there like it. But anyway, I found it mildly amusing and thought maybe some people would enjoy it. So here it is.

One day while I walked down Agricola st

A fearsome Vandari by chance I did meet.

I shivered in fear and looked all around,

At it's gruesome great teeth

Where blood driveled down.

Oh me! Dear lord! What a terrible sight!

I felt my pant leg moisten in fright.

My sweet husband Jesus! Deliver me from this Evil!

I squeaked and I squawked like a frantic dying beagle.

Then I heard a voice so soft and pure,

Saying "Come with me kid, I'm sure we'll find a cure."

"No" I said, "don't you get it can't you see.

That fearsome Vandari is trying to eat me"

"It's alright son nothings there, don't cry."

Was this strange voices only reply.

And then it hit me.

Of course! I know what I'll use.

Another hit of my end time prophet juice.

I knew where it was, in my left boot.

Next to the tracks with a syringe to shoot.

"Dear Jesus, thank you." I said with a grin.

"With the aid of my prophet juice there's no way I can't win."

And just as I prepared for my prophet juice fill up,

I found myself being pushed into a police truck.

I heard the officer saying "This ones a whirl,

He was pissing himself because of a squirrel."

The moral of my story is

When coming across a Vandari

Do not shoot your juice

Or you will be sorry...

Beets ;)

Reader's comments on this article

Add a new comment on this article

from Mydestinyismine
Saturday, February 21, 2004 - 00:05

Good one! Thoroughly enjoyed it.
(reply to this comment)
from merrily
Monday, February 02, 2004 - 10:37

Beets it was great made me laugh keep it up.
(reply to this comment)
From mikio
Thursday, February 12, 2004, 23:56


yeah, I thought it was pretty funny, in a Dr Seuss kind of way, I guess U'd be the SGA Dr Seuss...or Silverstein, he writes some funny kids poems. I've never seen poetry deal with serious things the way this type of poem does, I dont like serious poems and too many poems on this site are just like reading some damn OHR -- without getting all sappy, I think looking at some of these things in kind of a humorous way like this, kind of helps a bit. Another good poem on this site (maybe by same author?) was called "The Box" (I think),it was about the secrets we all keep and what its like living now with it, the writer had a damn good immagination, use of metaphor, meter and word-play. Nyways, I dont pretend to be into poetry, but this was good

(reply to this comment

From mikio
Thursday, February 12, 2004, 23:39


yeah, I thought it was pretty funny, in a Dr Seuss kind of way, I guess U can be the SGA Dr Seuss...or Silverstein, he writes some funny kids poems

(reply to this comment

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