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Getting Through : Lighten Up

Last words.

from Jesus Crust - Thursday, January 26, 2006
accessed 1397 times

Doth anyone know any “last words” leading to death or disaster like;

“I know it sounds crazy, but it just might work!”

“You stay here, I’ll go for help!”

“We need a distraction!”

“Shaggy, you and Scooby lure the ghost into the net!”

“I don’t think it’s poisonous!”

“On the count of three!”

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from MPD
Friday, July 14, 2006 - 08:14


Audioslave - Set it off

Suddenly a shot
Ripped into his heart
He lay in need of some attention
And there he played his card
Going into shock
The last thing that he said was
Set this fucker off

(reply to this comment)

from Seven ways to know her ill will
Saturday, July 01, 2006 - 16:43


1. "Well yes babe, your ass DOES actually look big in pretty much everything you wear."

2a. "Of course it's my fucking right to expect dinner on the table when I get home from work! Cleaning is definitely the woman's job. Ironing too. Well, I know that you work fulltime and also ferry the kids around and look after them for hours every day, but come on, I wouldn't know how to work the washing machine/hoover/iron even if I wanted to."

2b. Why do you look so frazzled all the time?"

3. "No, I do not think that Jessica Alba could do with gaining some weight. I think she's absolutely fucking perfect. Just look at that stomach. And those eyes/lips/boobs/legs. And that silky smooth hair.

*stares into space with a dreamy look in his eyes*

Five minutes later: But honey, you're so nice and, uh, cuddly and that's okay too, I guess."

4. "Oh, I would totally sleep with your best friend/sister/mom, and since we're being honest, no, you are not the only woman I've ever thought about fucking. You know that sexy chick two houses down, well, I thought of doing her while I was wanking this morning... Oh shit did I say that out loud?"

5. "Of course I am attracted to the young college chicks that I teach. Why the hell do you think I wanted the job??? I know that I'm supposed to say that I'm attracted to experience and maturity and all but come on, who am I kidding?"

6. "Don't worry, dear, I understand - There's only so much that gym/yoga/pilates/running/spinning/trampolining/*insert any number of fad diets* can do for a woman of YOUR age. Not to mention the fact that you're still eating all the damn pies. What IS it with you and food anyways?"

7. "Oh, sure I've noticed the cellulite. It's pretty hard not to. There are creams for that, you know. But in your case it might be just a little too late to fix it."

*Disclaimer: This in no way reflects my experience of what men are like, and I know that some, well most, okay so maybe ALL women (by which I mean 'I') have a problem with asking questions that really have no right answer. I think that maybe women - I mean I - need to learn not to ask questions unless they - again, I mean I - actually want to hear the answers. PTL, I am glad I could glean some lessons out of this exercise, what an edifying comment I managed to make!
(reply to this comment)

from Boom!
Wednesday, February 08, 2006 - 11:17


This is extremely flamable material....
(reply to this comment)

from Phoenixkidd
Wednesday, February 01, 2006 - 05:42


Wait till you see my "O"!

"Is that a gun in your pants?-- or are you just happy to see me!"

"Give me liberty or Death."

"Hell no! --We haven't even begun to Fight"

"Over my dead body! ---You Schmuck."

"I'll simply make him an offer he can't refuse"

"If a nail sticks up--Hammer it down"
(reply to this comment)

from Baxter
Wednesday, February 01, 2006 - 04:51


Empty-handed I entered the world

Barefoot I leave it.

My coming, my going --

Two simple happenings

That got entangled.

- Kozan Ichikyo (Apparently written on the day of his own death.)
(reply to this comment)

from kats
Tuesday, January 31, 2006 - 14:19

Lets split up...
(reply to this comment)
from solemn
Sunday, January 29, 2006 - 19:27


Fine, one more gin martini please.

Ok, one more and thats it!

OK, this is the last one.

Your'e driving, right?
(reply to this comment)

from Eric Cartman
Sunday, January 29, 2006 - 13:02


I think its still edible.

Well, I think this should hold.

No offense but....

What's your bra size?

Nice rack.

(reply to this comment)

from Kenny
Sunday, January 29, 2006 - 11:44

Yeah, I didn't die!!
(reply to this comment)
from EyesWideShut
Sunday, January 29, 2006 - 10:34


Just play it by ear.

I just have a gut feeling...

How much worse can it get, right?

I think we've hit an all time low.

Nothing will happen.

It'll be ok, I promise.

It's not that bad.

You go ahead, I'll catch up.

We cloned them from DNA millions of years old.

(reply to this comment)

From Movie Junkie
Sunday, January 29, 2006, 12:56

Don't say that. We are not gonna die.(reply to this comment
from Brokeback Crazy
Saturday, January 28, 2006 - 10:50


Quite Gay but funny,

"I am not like you!! I can't rely on a few high altitude Fucks to last me through each year!"
(reply to this comment)

from Baxter
Saturday, January 28, 2006 - 03:59


My absoluter favourite:

'Today is a good day to die!'

Crazy Horse, just before he wiped out Custer's detachment at Little Big Horn. Guess he wasn't talking about himself.
(reply to this comment)

from The Apple
Friday, January 27, 2006 - 17:18

"They're only little pills, they can't hurt you."
(reply to this comment)
From Baxter
Friday, January 27, 2006, 18:39


One pill makes you larger

And one pill makes you small

And the ones that mother gives you

Don't do anything at all

Go ask Alice

When she's ten feet tall(reply to this comment

Friday, January 27, 2006, 19:34

Is that a Grace Slick song? Now I know where they got the title to "Go ask Alice."(reply to this comment
From Baxter
Saturday, January 28, 2006, 03:57

Jefferson Airplane(reply to this comment
Saturday, January 28, 2006, 14:36

Wasn't Grace their singer?(reply to this comment
From Baxter
Saturday, January 28, 2006, 15:46

fucked if I know; I dunno shit about J.A., except that they had awesome sound; the song was 'white rabbbit' though.(reply to this comment
From indiechild
Saturday, January 28, 2006, 22:58

Agree/Disagree?) to this comment
Friday, January 27, 2006 - 15:54

"We have already issued numerous official apologies, we thought the old abuse issue was put to bed, er, uh, taken care of..."
(reply to this comment)
From Tom the Wankster
Saturday, January 28, 2006, 05:32

I swear, I didn't know she was 6.(reply to this comment
from Jesus Crust
Friday, January 27, 2006 - 14:10

Pulleth my fniger!
(reply to this comment)
From Jesus Crust
Friday, January 27, 2006, 14:11

FINGER!(reply to this comment
From Fish
Sunday, January 29, 2006, 17:06

Bang Bang, Finger BANG!(reply to this comment
from Nick
Friday, January 27, 2006 - 14:10

Hey, hold my beer while I try............
(reply to this comment)
from tudaisy
Friday, January 27, 2006 - 13:22


"look what I can do"

"I dare you to
(reply to this comment)

from Mr.T
Friday, January 27, 2006 - 09:01

(reply to this comment)
from Deadbeat
Friday, January 27, 2006 - 08:53

"Just pull out right before you cum."
(reply to this comment)
from solemn
Friday, January 27, 2006 - 08:49

"Wait, try cutting the blue wire".
(reply to this comment)
From Movie Junkie
Sunday, January 29, 2006, 12:54


Wassup ma nigga?

Is that the best you can do?

Sorry losers, but I'M going THIS way.

I'll f*ck you up.

Well hello babe.

You are surrounded. Put your hands on your head....

I can explain this...

Shh, I think I heard something..

Wait, we had a deal..

Take the woman to my quarters.

(reply to this comment

From Greatest movie ever made
Tuesday, January 31, 2006, 14:38


I've seen the horror. Horrors that you've seen. But you have no right to call me a murderer. You have no right to call me a murderer. You have a right to kill me. You have a right to do that, but you have no right to judge me . It's impossible for words to describe what is necessary to those who do not know what horror means. Horror. Horror has a face, and you must make a friend of horror. Horror and mortal terror are your friends. If they are not, then they are enemies t o be feared. They are truly enemies.

I remember when I was with Special Forces--it seems a thousand centuries ago--we went into a camp to inoculate it. The children. We left the camp after we had inoculated the children for polio, and this old man came running after us, and he was crying. He couldn't see. We went there, and they had come and hacked off every inoculated arm. There they were in a pile--a pile of little arms. And I remember...I...I...I cried, I wept like some grandmother. I wanted to tear my teeth out, I didn't know what I wanted to do. And I want to remember it, I never want to forget.

And then I realized--like I was I was shot with a diamond...a diamond bullet right through my forehead. And I thought, "My God, the genius of that, the genius, the will to do that." Perfect, genuine, complete, crystalline, pure. And then I realized they could stand that--these were not monsters, these were men, trained cadres, these men who fought with their hearts, who have families, who have children, who are filled wi th love--that they had this strength, the strength to do that. If I had ten divisions of those men, then our troubles here would be over very quickly. You have to have men who are moral and at the same time were able to utilize their primordial i nstincts to kill without feeling, without passion, without judgment--without judgment . Because it's judgment that defeats us.

I worry that my son might not understand what I've tried to be, and if I were to be killed, Willard, I would want someone to go to my home and tell my son everything. Everything I did, everything you saw, because there's nothing that I detest more than t he stench of lies. And if you understand me, Willard, will do this for me.(reply to this comment

from solemn
Friday, January 27, 2006 - 08:02

"Pull the pin and count to ten, or is it pull the pin and throw. Ah, you'll know what to do."
(reply to this comment)

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