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Getting Through : Lighten Up

Mo's Conclusion, or, The Iraqi Information Minister Speaks Out!

from roughneck - Monday, June 13, 2005
accessed 2028 times

Dear Family,

GBAKYWOTJ3TADAPTHC*! (*God Bless And Keep You Whacking Off To Jesus 3 Times A Day As Per The Charter) We would like to take this opportunity to announce the addition of a new member to our Middle East Family Spokesperson team. He has many years of experience in dealing with very pointed questions from the AC Media, and as such should be invaluable in answering accusations from the Antichrist American News as well as allegations from bitter apostate ex-SGA Vandari types as well.

Following is a transcript of a very inspiring interview that "Mo" recently conducted with a member of the AC Media, and we think The Lord really punched through with some incredible material, PTL

(end of message from WS)

Interviewer: I'm here today with Mohammed Sayeed Al-Sahaf, the former Minister of Information for Saddam Hussein and a recent recruit to the controversial religious organization known as The Family. Mister Sahaf, tell me, was there ever abuse in The Family?

MSS: "There are no abuse in The Family. Never!"

Interviewer: That's interesting, because many if not most young people who have left The Family International's fellowship have alleged that quite a lot of physical and sexual, to say nothing of emotional, abuse occurred, particularly in the 80's. In fact, Lord Justice Ward, in a British Court's judgment on The Family, clearly stated that he found abuse in The Family to have been widespread, rampant, even. What do you have to say about that?

MSS: I can assure you that those villains will recognize, will discover in appropriate time in the future how stupid they are and how they are pretending things which have never taken place. Don't believe anything! We will chase the rascals back to London!

Interviewer: Okaaay then. How do you respond to the frequently aired statement that The Family does not educate its children to a legally required minimum?

MSS: "They are lying every day. They are lying always, and mainly they are lying to their public opinion."

Interviewer: In light of the recent payouts by the Catholic church to victims of priestly pedophilia, what, if any, are The Family International's plans for compensating victims of abuse?

MSS: We're now trying to exhaust them, until our leadership decides the time and method to clean our territory of their desecration. Those Family fighters are slapping those Vandari gangsters on the face, and then when they flee, they will kick their backsides. Our initial assessment is that they will all die. My feelings - as usual - we will slaughter them all. We are surrounding them and pounding them. The whole trend has changed and we are going to finalize this very soon. After we finish defeating all of those animals we will disclose that with facts and figures.

Interviewer: Strong sentiments, and bold plans I see. What do you say to the fact that many allegations have been leveled against prominent leaders of The Family, up to and including King Peter himself, by many, many ex-members of The Family?

MSS: I have detailed information about the situation...which completely proves that what they allege are illusions . . . They lie every day. Lying is forbidden in The Family. King Peter will tolerate nothing but truthfulness as he is a man of great honor and integrity. Everyone is encouraged to speak freely of the truths evidenced in their eyes and hearts.

Interviewer: As long as what they have to say "toes the party line", am I right? Witness the closed comments forms on the various "cult members speak out" sites. In short, what about the many on the website who take the opposite view of the situation?

MSS: God will roast their stomachs in hell at the hands of The Family. We are in control. They are in a state of hysteria. Losers, they think that by trying to distort the feelings of the people they will win. I think they will not win, those bastards. We are not afraid of the Vandari. God has condemned them. They are stupid. They are stupid, (dramatic pause) and they are condemned. Just look carefully, I only want you to look carefully. Do not repeat the lies of liars. Do not become like them. Once again, I blame the media before it ascertains what takes place. Please, make sure of what you say and do not play such a role.

Interviewer: Sure thing. What of the famous "pubs purges"?

MSS: We have destroyed 50 books. That 5-ohhh books. [while holding up his fingers] We went into the Lit Trunks and crushed them, we cleaned the WHOOOLE place out, they were burned.

Interviewer: What of this particular publication? [holds up pages of the Dito Book]

MSS: Those are not Family children at all. Where did they bring them from? They are trying to fool you. They are showing any old pictures. Please, please! The Vandari are relying on what I called yesterday a desperate and stupid method. This is unbased.

Interviewer: Can you confirm the fact that "Heaven's Girl" was required reading for young children at it's time of publication?

MSS: By God, I think this is rather very unlikely. This is merely a prattle.

Interviewer: Did David Berg have sexual relations with his daughters and granddaughter?

MSS: I will only answer reasonable questions.

Interviewer: Where do the leaders of The Family reside at present?

MSS: They are nowhere (pause)...they are nowhere, really.

Interviewer: Are you concerned that prosecution of your leaders will occur should their whereabouts become public knowledge?

MSS: No I am not scared, and neither should you be!

Interviewer: Ok, then, if so many ex-members of The Family have the same story to tell in their affidavits, doesn't that tend to confirm the veracity of the events they recount?

MSS: We expect the aggressors to use anything, we don't rule out that in their depression at being vanquished, those losers will become hysterical and commit even more folly. They are becoming hysterical. This is the result of frustration.

Interviewer: Specifically, what about the allegations made by the ex-members James Penn, Edward Priebe and Sam Ajemian?

MSS: Who is this dog James Penn? Penn, Priebe and Ajemian. They are the funny trio. We feed them death and hell!

Interviewer: Any last thoughts before we go?

MSS: Yes! We are winning!

Interviewer: Well, that's about all the time we have for today. Thank you Mister Sahaf for your time. This is Antichrist American News signing off. Good Night.

(thanks very much to for the quotations. :)

Reader's comments on this article

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from Wolf
Thursday, June 16, 2005 - 00:12


Amen! God damn the black antichrist homosexual Jewish Vandari! God bless Ghadafi, Sadam Insane, Gorbachov (Godís son), Rasputin, Al Capone, Pol Pot, Hitler, and all the other heros that are made out to be heels by the godless American media. It wonít be long now before the Russians and Arabs rule the world, and America the Whore is vanquished!
(reply to this comment)

from Kelly
Tuesday, June 14, 2005 - 08:32

That was fucking fantastic!
(reply to this comment)
from ErikMagnusLehnsher
Monday, June 13, 2005 - 19:31

Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5(Agree/Disagree?)
ROTFLMAO! Rough, that was an instant classic.
(reply to this comment)

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