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The telephone asshole

from holysavage - Friday, March 18, 2005
accessed 2002 times

Did you know that here in Rio, in the neighborhood of Jacarepagua, there is an asshole ex-David, now Abner, who keeps "rebuking Satan" everytime an exmember calls?

He did this to me when I tried to get ahold of a friend that lives in his home (and because of this, this "shepherd" cut off all contact between us). I called to try and talk to her and this asshole got on the phone demanding to know who it was and why I wanted to talk to her.

I explained that it was to give back a couple of CD's she had lent me and this idiot started to get all nervous, saying that she didn't want to talk to me any longer, not to ever call again, all that kind of cult control s**t. I then asked him what was wrong with him, why he was getting so nervous and he then yelled, "I'm not nervous! I'm rebuking you Satan!" Ha! Ha! Ha!

Who are you to "rebuke Satan"? Fuck you, Abner! Bet you didn't know it was me who called the other day, did you? Up yours, Abner! (ex- David)

Reader's comments on this article

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from garotadeipanema
Wednesday, March 30, 2005 - 06:29

(Agree/Disagree?)
Why are you still interested in contacting a family home? Move on already and stop whining when the pricks in TF don't treat you politely.
(reply to this comment)
from HVV
Tuesday, March 29, 2005 - 12:27

(Agree/Disagree?)

Suggestions.

1:: Call them up and offer them some aid for their work, leave a number. When they call back, reroute the call to Fiji, and chat for hours on end about possibly hooking them up with a Nigerian general that needs somebody to help him launder money, or offer free 10 day old milk.

2:: Call them up and offer them some aid for their work, leave a number. Give them the number to a live telephone talk show program.

3:: Call them up and tell them that you have a tip from a friendly local social services worker, who says their home will be raided. Let some local people know the house will be empty, and they have free TV's.

4:: Call them up and ask them to fax you some information on the activated program. Give them your phone number. When they try to fax through, leave your phone off the hook, so they spend forever's worth of bux sending a fax to your phoneline.

5:: Call them up and tell them that u want to invite them for a show in a rural village. Give them a location in the bushes nowhere. Call them back to ask them how the show went.

6:: Call them up and say you want to talk to Karen Zerby. When they tell you they don't have anyone living there, tell them you want to speak to "Queen Maria". Enjoy the silence following, and know there are shivers going up their spine.

7:: Call them up and say you need an exorcism performed. Give them the address to some demon worshipping organization. Drive up to watch them getting kicked out.

8:: Tell them you are suicidal, and god told you to call this number. While they are trying to talk about god, go agnostic on them and debate everything they say. Start talking about your favorite pizza toppings, and go into underwear color, end with "I can see you".

9:: Call them up and hold a electric shaver to the mic. Talk mumbo jumbo, and use the words, Bush, Anti-christ, persecution, begin, run, for, life, god, with, you, Scream very loudly. Use another guys voice to say words like Fucking, religious, extremists, kill, all, inbetween the buzz of the shaver.

10: Call them up, and play songs loudly in the background, while telling them that you want to contribute to their finances. Some songs to play. Eminem "Kill you", Limp Bizkit "Breakstuff", REM "Losing my religion", John Lennon "Imagine", (pull volume up in select sections of the song.) suddenly play a portion of "It's the Music" to catch them off guard, say "fucking gay song" then abrutly switch the tape to Slipknot.
(reply to this comment)

From angiem
Saturday, August 13, 2005, 08:39

(Agree/Disagree?)
LOL(reply to this comment
From Shaka
Tuesday, March 29, 2005, 12:39

(Agree/Disagree?)

LOL! All excellent ideas. It reminds me of the best way to make telemarketers work for their money. When they call you and start harrassing you, tell them you're about to kill yourself unless they can talk you out of it. Lots of fun.(reply to this comment

from one who knows
Monday, March 21, 2005 - 14:54

(Agree/Disagree?)

pls update your e-mail account so i can ask you a question. lf_spaceman@yahoo.com.br has been discontinued. thanks.
(reply to this comment)

From holysavage
Saturday, March 26, 2005, 06:57

(Agree/Disagree?)


My new e-mail is: upper_road@yahoo.com ,but Iīve got a question for you. May I just ask you who you are? Not that I donīt trust you or anything, Iīd just like to put a name to you.(reply to this comment

From Shaka
Saturday, March 26, 2005, 09:05

(Agree/Disagree?)
But it's one who knows! Surely with such a knowledgeable name he/she/it can be trusted completely!(reply to this comment
From holysavage
Tuesday, March 29, 2005, 07:28

(Agree/Disagree?)


Not always, Shaka! Who knows if this "knowledgable one" is really one of us? I just thought it strange that I couldnīt read their profile here.(reply to this comment

From Shaka
Tuesday, March 29, 2005, 08:48

(Agree/Disagree?)
LOL, I was being sarcastic. Anonymity has been one of my pet peeves for awhile on this site.(reply to this comment
From holysavage
Tuesday, March 29, 2005, 07:27

(Agree/Disagree?)


Not always, Shaka! Who knows if this "knowledgable one" is really one of us? I just thought it strange that I couldnīt read their profile here.(reply to this comment

From holysavage
Tuesday, March 29, 2005, 07:27

(Agree/Disagree?)


Not always, Shaka! Who knows if this "knowledgable one" is really one of us? I just thought it strange that I couldnīt read their profile here.(reply to this comment

from Shaka
Monday, March 21, 2005 - 10:48

(Agree/Disagree?)
Please may I have that home's number? This can provide hours of quality entertainment for me. E-mail it to me. Thx
(reply to this comment)
From holysavage
Saturday, March 26, 2005, 07:01

(Agree/Disagree?)


Shaka, Iīll give it to you here. Itīs here in Rio thoī if ur up to it. lol! Here goes! The number is: 55- 21- 2425-8108. Have a good time!(reply to this comment

From Shaka
Saturday, March 26, 2005, 09:03

(Agree/Disagree?)
Thank you very much! With April Fools Day coming up and all, one needs an outlet for one's hostility so one does not take it out on one's unsuspecting friends. Why the hell am I referring to myself as one? I must be the ONE! (reply to this comment
From roughneck
Tuesday, March 29, 2005, 13:09

(Agree/Disagree?)
We're going to need guns...lots of guns.

That ought to start WS squawking about violent ex-member rhetoric, eh? :)(reply to this comment
From MariaKL
Friday, March 25, 2005, 14:46

(Agree/Disagree?)
Thats sounds like just the kind of time killer I need, can u email me the number too? thx(reply to this comment
From holysavage
Saturday, March 26, 2005, 07:03

(Agree/Disagree?)


To all: I just put their number here for Shaka, so go for it. The guyīs an asshole anyways. Happy phoning, all!(reply to this comment

From Gothsmack
Friday, March 25, 2005, 15:49

(Agree/Disagree?)
I have a long weekend with not much to do...It will be fun to annoy them as they celebrate Easter. Send me the number as well. :D(reply to this comment
From Wait a minute
Friday, March 25, 2005, 17:03

(
Agree/Disagree?)

It's one thing for the author of this post to argue with these people, he has a reason to call them. But I don't think we should be making crank calls to Family homes we don't even know.

Can you imagine if some of those wingnuts from myconclusion started calling us at odd hours? I know I'd be pissed.(reply to this comment

From Shaka
Friday, March 25, 2005, 22:48

(Agree/Disagree?)
Oh I'd be tickled pink. (reply to this comment
From $$$
Saturday, March 26, 2005, 12:15

(
Agree/Disagree?)

Oh yes! Bravely crack call them. Courageously harrass them at home. Heroically hamper their daily lives for a few minutes of entertainment!

Just don't be annonymous, that's bad.(reply to this comment

From $$$
Saturday, March 26, 2005, 18:48

(
Agree/Disagree?)
Duh, *crank. Silly.(reply to this comment
From ErikMagnusLehnsher
Saturday, March 26, 2005, 15:43

(Agree/Disagree?)

"Crack" call?!? I have unfortunatley received a couple of those...

I agree it wouldn't be right to call any old Home to harass them...but for this guy I would probably make an exception. All that Devil rebukin' could make for a quality "Crank Yankers" segment.(reply to this comment

From Baxter
Tuesday, March 22, 2005, 01:58

(Agree/Disagree?)

Good Idea!!

(reply to this comment

From MariaKL
Saturday, March 26, 2005, 10:49

(Agree/Disagree?)
yes maybe we should open a phone line for them to call us for our conclusion kind like their 1800 number, does anyone know if that is on and what the whole number is?(reply to this comment

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