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Getting Real : Speak your peace

Mysterious or Dumb?

from Jerseygirl - Wednesday, October 09, 2002
accessed 1577 times

What do you all think?

Ever meet those people who seldom say much either at a party or in a group and everyone thinks they must have some great depth due to their silent "mysteriousness"?
Then you got the folks who say what they think... It's really not that what they say is dumb, they just happen to know a lot on a variety of topics.

Is this a case of everyone perceiving that "quality" is measured by "quantity" as in those saying less have more to say than those who are saying more? OK this is confusing--LOL!

I guess what I'm trying to say is: Is Silent Bob in fact deep or just trying to figure out what the hell to say? We have all talked the shit out of the issue so maybe all you "educated"(or not) folks could enlighten us a little.

Reader's comments on this article

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from Anthony
Saturday, March 22, 2003 - 14:43


I liked this article so much, as well as the discussion which follows, that I have included it in one of my stories.  Jerseygirl, your mind is attractively fascinating.



(reply to this comment)
From Anthony
Saturday, March 22, 2003, 14:44

Actually, I have included my interpretation or version of it.(reply to this comment
from Joe H
Saturday, March 08, 2003 - 19:14

I've noticed that stupid people will allude to the film "Dogma" at some point during any theological debate, in light of which I'd like to say "Et tu Jerz?"
(reply to this comment)
From Jerseygirl
Saturday, March 08, 2003, 19:44

"Nemo me impune lacessit."(reply to this comment
from cs
Thursday, March 06, 2003 - 23:47

Quiet people suck!!! Its true, they either really don't have anything to say or they're too slow to say it. Quiet guys seem like wimps and creep the hell out of me. "I don't want no shy guy, I just want a fly guy"....
(reply to this comment)
From mysterious
Friday, March 07, 2003, 01:58

well.....i tend to agree with Hanna on this one...your "fly guys" might be great fun - for one nite - however people that don't just talk without having anything to say are definitely more interesting in the long run as at least when they do speak it's usually something way more interesting than superficial talk - which gets on my nerves personally!

but hey, everyone's entitled to their own opinion and there definitely is enuff out here to satisfy everyone's appetites.....

long live mystery!!(reply to this comment
From cs doesnt want to log in
Friday, March 07, 2003, 22:58


When quiet people finally do speak, your not getting these supposed words of wisdom your just getting months of pent-up frustrations from no communication. Whereas normal people express themselves continuously; which is more healthy. Depends on how you like it I guess. So there's a correalation between fly guys and one night stands huh? And just when I was about to generalize about all men. Good to know. LOL (reply to this comment
From visitor
Saturday, March 08, 2003, 05:33

ok(reply to this comment
From cs to visitor
Saturday, March 08, 2003, 17:22

visitor, you must be one of those "quiet people." Whatever, is all cool. (reply to this comment
from Hanna_Black
Tuesday, October 15, 2002 - 09:55

Average visitor agreement is 3.5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 3.5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 3.5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 3.5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 3.5 out of 5(Agree/Disagree?)
As far as I have seen, the quieter guys (not necessarily girls)often have more to them than their shyness. I usually went for the quiter guys, their personalities (in general) often excelled the ones of a loudmouth. I once knew this guy, some people would have at first glance said he was a geek. He wore glasses, sat on his computer, and when there were a bunch of people in a room, he would sit off in a corner and play his guitar. He didn't strike me as anything special the first time I saw him, but we started talking a lot. he was the greatest person I ever met, he could talk, yes, but at least he knew what he was talking about. Some people just ramble on cuz they don't know what else to do, but not him. The good thing about quiet people is that they listen to you, unlike the blabmouth who can ramble on while you don't get in a word edgewise. So, at first this shy-guy and me were just friends, but slowly I started falling in love with him.
Now, we are married 6 years.
I never regretted meeting that shy-guy.
(reply to this comment)
from tommyknocker
Friday, October 11, 2002 - 18:55

I knew this guy when I was 17 he was pretty quiet and he didn't look like much, either(skinny, glasses, geek). Whenever there were more than 2 other people in the room he wouldn't say a thing. I'm not sure what everyone thought of him but I think most pepole didn't seem to notice he was around. --Untill he started to regularly be seen with 2 or 3 girls around him. Thats when the other guys started to wonder what he was about. He told me once that some of the "cool" guys came up to and asked him what his secret was and how he got the chicks to hang around him. They were pretty sure he was "getting some" --he wasn't.
Then there was this other guy I knew. Typical loud mouth. Always had a story to tell. It was not uncommon for him to be seen surrounded by 10-20 people. Laughing, crying, eagerly listening to what he had to say. Sometimes I would just listen and observe from a distance. Most of his stories were rather odinary and if anyone else would have told the same story the response would have been lame. He had a gift. The gift of blab. He also had a lot of chicks around him. And he WAS "getting some". I remember he got this girl pregnant. He didn't want to be the Dad, though.
The moral of my story....
um...not sure...
(reply to this comment)
from J.D. Person
Friday, October 11, 2002 - 14:56

My law school classmates who got the top level of honors will be clerking on the Supreme Court and doing anything they want. There was remarkable diversity in this group. I remember a couple of them who confidently chimed in about every other case to the point of seeming to be co-teaching on some days. But one of my closest friends there was in this top 3% of the class, and was very quiet, only speaking when called upon and even then was very economical with words. One time the whole Corporations class of like 100 people broke out laughing because this person's laconic answer to a question was so spare. And one professor I had, who is an expert in her field and wrote the textbook, was painfully shy. All this to say that some Silent Bobs may actually be trying to figure out what the hell to say, but then again they may just not feel like saying much. Unlike the talkers, the silent ones leave you guessing about the quality what they have to say because they are not providing you with material on the basis of which to make your diagnosis. You don't have to be quiet to be deep, and some talkers are as brilliant as some retiring types. It's a matter of personality, IMO.
(reply to this comment)
From J.D. Person
Friday, October 11, 2002, 15:08

I almost forgot another one of these people. Talk about Silent Bobs! He lived in my dorm first year, and I wondered about him until the grades were published and he was at the very top. He shuffled around looking like a deer in the headlights and harldy knew how to answer people who said "hi" to him in the elevator. One of my more sociable friends' boyfriend was his roomate and had to coach him because he was having a hard time with job interviews despite his brilliance. Every single year he was at the very top, but he had all the personality of a dormouse. Everybody is different, which is what makes people interesting and a puzzle.(reply to this comment
from Lance
Thursday, October 10, 2002 - 21:09

Some people are just naturally aloof...okay I'm going to go hide now.
(The strange irony about this question is that those who are more likely to respond are those who talk too much... or post too much... okay, I'll shut up now.)
(reply to this comment)
From Jerseygirl
Friday, October 11, 2002, 13:10

Actually the irony will be that those who post or talk too much will probably NOT respond. (reply to this comment
From Silvery
Friday, March 07, 2003, 04:29

That may be odd or conflicting but it isn't ironic. (reply to this comment
From Ian
Friday, October 11, 2002, 22:34

I am, at times, accused of talking to much. However, some of the best arguements, discussions, and posts I will not participate in becuase so much has already been said and it's enough for me to simply "grok" on whats been put on the table.

For example; Albatross has some terrific thoughts posted on this site that I have never said a word about (until know) because there is nothing to say, it's excellent. Anthony's post about hit men is the opposite extreme, I just can't bring myself to add to the insanity.

"Another fine post by ian"

(reply to this comment

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