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Getting Real : Speak your peace

Letting it all out

from Joe H - Friday, November 12, 2004
accessed 1714 times

(I was inspired to write this after someone hijacked ThinkingDavinci's article about taxes to start mudslinging some girl named Esther)

It always amuses me the way completely unrelated articles can quickly degenerate into a gossip fest about some person that 75% of us have never heard of. I hereby propose that we start a section called "The Sewing Circle," where people can post articles bad-mouthing other young people who happened to be better-looking, better-behaved, or more popular than they were. It could be located just outside the Trailer Park. Then we could choose the saddest, most pathetically bitter people and start a collection for their plastic surgery or psycho-therapy, whichever seems more appropriate.

I'd like to volunteer to get everybody in the spirit by airing some of my own greivances. PTL, honda balonda, ibbidee shibbidee, sacalabasura holagranputa:

Daniel Albatross gave me one of the longest spankings of my life when he was my OC shepherd, but I still loved him because he was 10 times more interesting at devotions than all your Auntie Hopefuls, Uncle Jezekiahs, and Uncle Fartamores put together. And the last time I was in LA he got me really drunk and we called it even. Daniel, you rock and your car kicks ass.

Lance once hit me over the head with my own guitar. Lance, you were such a geek, but I commiserate with you because I was a geek most of my life. Come to think of it, I still am, I just wear a really good pretty-boy disguise. Lance, I forgive you. And you're the only Texan Democrat I know.

Katrina once asked me to go the front of the singing team bus to get her a cup of chocolate milk, and then when Uncle Steven saw me and assumed I was taking a second 6 oz ration, she denied it. Thrice, like Peter denied Jesus, and I got in huge trouble. Kat, I forgive you, because you're a really cool person, I'm in love with your sister, and the real reason I got in trouble was the third cup I tried to steal later. These days, I indulge my chocoholism with impunity, and can't help but laugh when I think that I was once willing to risk a beating for chocolate as sub-par as Nestle Quik.

Chris D aka Chris Doofus, I don't forgive you. You and your goofball mother, Amy, are the reason I hate Canadians. Your sister was nice, but she made the most god-awful food. That being said, congratulations on graduating from clown college. Keep going for God, I guess.

I'd also like to briefly express my bitterness toward all the cool older teen boys who I resented (but secretly looked up to) because they got all the girls. Granted, those girls wouldn't have slept with me anyway because I was 13, and such a geek that Chris D and Lance were my only friends. John Phoenix, Sam Piper, David [insert initial here], you know who you are.

Ahhhh, that feels better. Who's next?

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from Jerseygirl
Tuesday, December 07, 2004 - 09:31

Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5(Agree/Disagree?)

I didn't think this article was that funny, at least at first. With all due respect to Joe, because I do usually respect his obnoxious intelligence, I have a hard time finding humor in my own similar experiences. It made me think though and I realised that some things we've all gone through amongst ourselves (not the older generation) HAVE to be forgiven if only for the fact that we were all so young and really just trying to make it through things that none of us should have been going through in the first place.

When I was 12 going on 13 I was shipped off to Macau because the Jumbo was already full up on teens for training. My smart parents figured if they had to leave the field of India well then their daughter should do her best to remain on the "field" for them. So there I am small, with tiny boobies, and basically emaciated from being in India and also having very bad ashma. I get to travel with my best friend and two others. Heidi was one of those girls who was beautiful and you loved her for it--she was not a "mean girl" in the least. Nature had chosen to bestow on her the most beautiful breasts I have ever seen, large round and without the least bit of saggage. We arrive in Macau and the four of us are put in quarintine because we came from another field. Nat basically spent his whole time begging Heidi to sleep with him, after we were rudely awakened to the rule of sleeping in the nude with bed checks and demerits. (This was when they would pass out the KY and tissues as a bedtime event) I of course had the honors of sleeping with Heidi because there were only three beds and the other chick was a bit prudish. Finally one nite as Nat is doing his usual routine of begging at the bedside, I say to him that I would be willing to sleep with him. He looks at me and tells me that I should check back with him when I "grow a set of boobs". I can honestly say that I was not crushed. I was pissed off and upset but he didnt crush me. All I can say is that I forgive Nat for his silly horny teen boy ways because he was still a good guy in the long run and I did like him at least a lot more than the others and because he had to go and view his first public beating the next morning. And anyways Nat, you really should have seen the set I did grow--;-)

That was not the only experience of that nature that I had the pleasure of going through in that place, but I'll keep trying to see how I can make something out of it. Hmmmmmmmm--getting spanked by the shepherdess with a flyswatter and my pants down in front of her creepy husband.......trying ....trying....
(reply to this comment)

from Lance
Monday, November 15, 2004 - 20:01


I smacked you over the head with your own guitar? Why don't I remember that?

And I wasn't a geek, because as Milhouse from the simpsons wisely said: "I'm not a geek,... geeks are smart!".

It's good to hear that you still consider me a friend from way back then.

(reply to this comment)

from Phoenixkidd
Monday, November 15, 2004 - 18:31


That was a funny article, I am sure all of us when we were kids were unjustly punished for things we didn't do. For instance once when I was 12 I was supposed to be taking care of this group of kids who were supposed to be napping, which included my fat little brother, well he was actin up so I decided to give him some punishment and force his face into the futon, or quilt. I know it sounds harsh but it was only for a few seconds. Well he got mad of course and picked up a brush and and threw it at me. It missed and hit this girl who was sitting up in her little bunkbed. The thang was possessed, it hit the girl with all it's bristles and she started bleeding a little and then a few days later turned into a big bruise. Well somehow it got interpreted to all the adults that I had hit this girl in the head with a brush cause she was acting up. My Dad was furious and promptly spanked me and another "teamwork" member lectured me and tried to get me on some word project etc...It hurt my ego most of all cause we were supposed to be responsible teenagers to help another home out.

All this goes to say, we weren't allowed to be children. We were always supposeed to be responsible and be a good sample. That generation of kids were completely messed up I had no courage to even say what I had done, in this instance. We were put in charge of other children at such a young age without training, and sometimes inflicted spankings or other abuse on them thinking it was right. That was the whole cult mentality we were our own abusers by ignorance, I shudder when I think that there are still kids in TF who have to endure such things.
(reply to this comment)

From banal_commentator
Tuesday, November 16, 2004, 11:13

Hahahhahahahahahahahaa, Hillarious. I can just imagine that! (reply to this comment
from sarafina
Monday, November 15, 2004 - 10:48

Lmao! I just want to say this is one of the funniest post you've ever posted. I was laughing for quite sometime. Loved it. What a great idea as long as it's done in good taste like you have. Honest yet forgiving and very entertaining. I give you 4 thumbs up on this one.
(reply to this comment)
from Shackled
Sunday, November 14, 2004 - 02:45

Good Stuff!!!
(reply to this comment)
from porceleindoll
Friday, November 12, 2004 - 17:44


Hahaha! I loved it Joe!!

Hmm, I hated being around the Tokyo teen group back in '85 cause they were so cool and lived at the NAS Home or something, had a singing group, and got to be together, while I was isolated in Shizuoka with my sisters, Sunny and Kelly, making me the country hick. When I did get chances to be in Tokyo though, the cool teen group basically ignored me, I was never what you'd call cool. Oh well! It's so nice to grow up and be confident in who you are, not worried about being 'in' all the time.

The interesting thing though is in later years, after the TTC, I got to live with many of the teens from that group, and they turned out to be pretty nice on a personal level, and I made friends with most of them.

Ummm, most of my grudges though are against the "adults", Ricky is one, John PI, those are the biggest two that still make me angry, not to mention the ones I personally know who abused my sisters, peers and students in my care.

Oh yes, there was a teen girl from the PI, she stole a gold necklace from me and lied to my face while it was hanging around her neck, and I didn't have the guts to pursue it.

I always liked your parents Joe, they were nice to me and I appreciated it that.
(reply to this comment)

From Baxter
Wednesday, November 17, 2004, 05:17


Well, if this is all in fun, I'm gonna have a go.

Porceleindoll, I dunno if you remember me, but when I was a junior teen in tokyo, I was probably the most hated geek of them all( at least that's what I thought); I hung out with the whacky SC boys clique (I wasn't even one of the wigger crew), and I had almost no friends. And I pretty much secretly hated you, your brother and your sisters (and your dad- from when I was in Nagoya). When Amy was the SC secretary she gave me such a fucking hard time- likely coz I did annoy her somewhat and I probably had a crush on her anyway( am I admitting this? oh fuck cares, I was 13). I thought you and the whole shepherding crew, including your bro's stepmother pheonix, were a bunch of whack motherfuckers. I always thought you people never cut me any slack, and I hated always being labelled as a nerd. I'm not actually sure why I hated you particularly, I just did.

Strange, that. Oh well, I feel better.(reply to this comment

From porceleindoll
Wednesday, November 17, 2004, 17:08

Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5(Agree/Disagree?)

Baxter, it's great to know you're over your past geeky, nerdy self. Although, amazingly enough, it's usually the geeks who make out best in life and run businesses, corporations, etc. As for hating me, it actually doesn't bother me that much, and maybe if we meet up one day again I can apologise in person for being such a b**** to you and you won't hate me anymore? It was actually people like you that made me choose to leave the cult, trying to force square pegs into round holes, it just wasn't working, and in the process making myself and those I was trying to pound into those holes miserable. I'm so so glad you got out and have done something else with yourself, if anyone had a brain, it was you. Whenever I think of encyclopedias, you pop into my mind, especially Britannicas. And sorry for being a part of the shepherding lot, wish I could go back and change it (and a lot of other stuff).(reply to this comment

From Baxter
Thursday, November 18, 2004, 06:34


Nah,the fact that I'm studying history is proof positive that I ain't over being a geek. I'm glad to know my identity had a part in helping you leave. You probably weren't that much of a bitch, but you and the rest of the YA shepherds became symbolic for everything that I hated about being young. In any case it was a difficult way to grow up, as you can attest, so I'm actually glad I sorted that out. It's all cool, as it were.

I would have read something else if only I wouldn't have been kept out of the library.(reply to this comment

From Cult Surfer
Thursday, November 18, 2004, 09:20


Being pushed into a youth leadership role was a form of survival for me. It was a way to get out from under the thumbs of adults and abusive teen shepherds and obtain some respect and freedom in an environment that offered little. I look at how you turned out now, and from what China has told me, and can only be happy for your success and that you had more balls than me to leave at a younger age. I'll be the first to admit my mistakes in the Family, it wasn't so much as to what I did, but my affiliation with the YA leadership group that I regret. Obviously being a "geek", as you put it, has in fact worked in your favor and has helped you think outside of the family's box. If it makes you feel any better, knowing what we know now I can't think of anyone who wasn't a geek.

My apology for any negative influence or actions I might have had in your life. You and your bro's are always welcomed at my place in San Diego if you wish to hit me up, or just wish to hit me. I hope this isn't too little too late. (reply to this comment

From Baxter
Friday, November 19, 2004, 02:46


No worries, man. It's actually very good to hear that from you. Like I said, I'm not totally sure why I hated you or your sister exactly, but you simply became a symbol of my frustration. Ultimately, it's hard to stay angry at people of the second generation, partially because none of us had many alternatives, and partially because of the solidarity factor, I guess.

(reply to this comment

From Cult Surfer
Friday, November 19, 2004, 07:36

gud stuff(reply to this comment
From Tim R
Tuesday, November 16, 2004, 00:29

Yeah, I remember that Tokyo teen group, what a bunch of jerks. ;-)(reply to this comment
From porceleindoll
Wednesday, November 17, 2004, 17:11


Hahaha! Not that bad of jerks, just teens.(reply to this comment

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