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from murasaki Wednesday, September 20, 2006 - 06:06 (Agree/Disagree?) I can relate to just wanting everything to be finished. I never actually tried to kill myself, but I wanted life to be over, I remember doing crazy things and just hoping that one of them would kill me. It lasted about 4 years, but it did get better. I remember the first time I stood on a high building and felt fear looking down, I realized that it was because I finally had something to live for and no longer wanted to die. Building relationships and having people that depend on you can make a difference and medication can help too. Depression is a clinical condition with underlying biological causes and there is no shame in taking medicine for an illness. I can understand that it may seem like a relief to end it all, but the fact that you are questioning it makes me think that you still have a desire to live. It would be a shame to end it prematurely without first exploring all possible options. Hope it gets better for you soon. (reply to this comment)

from Wednesday, September 20, 2006 - 01:35 (Agree/Disagree?) If I wanted to kill myself, I would so go bungee jumping & sky-diving first. (reply to this comment)

from smashingirl Tuesday, September 19, 2006 - 12:38 (Agree/Disagree?) Rootbeer floats and chili-cheese dogs....always a good reason to stick around. Seriously though, you know the "freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose"? It's true. If you have nothing to lose, you can do anything you want. Have fun with it and see where it'll take you. You only get one shot at this shitty ass ride we call life. Use it for all it's worth. The breath from your own lips, the touch of fingertips A sweet and tender kiss The sound of a midnight train, wearing someone's ring Someone calling your name Somebody so warm cradled in your arm Didn't you think you were worth anything Millions of us in love, promises made good Your own flesh and blood Looking for some truth, dancing with no shoes The beat, the rhythm, the blues The pounding of your heart's drum together with another one Didn't you think anyone loved you See what you lost when you left this world, this sweet old world -Lucinda Williams (reply to this comment)

from steam Tuesday, September 19, 2006 - 09:32 (Agree/Disagree?) I don't want to trivialise this but you could look at it as simple math. Ending it all would remove any possible upside down the road, so your odds are better with plowing ahead. (reply to this comment)

from exister99 Tuesday, September 19, 2006 - 09:01 (Agree/Disagree?) Every evening there is one compelling reason why I don't put a bullet in my brain: I can't stand the thought of not being around to find out what kind of whacky shit is going to happen tomorrow. Aren't you the least bit curious? (reply to this comment)

From Weeder Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 18:17 (Agree/Disagree?) Sure Im curious about death. Every year for the past 4 years someone close to me has died ( through suicide by the way). But one thing you got to realise is we are all gonna die one day. Its gonna happen! So if youre so curious about it dont worry it will happen. But just think how curious life can be too. And if you kill yourself you'll never know what could happen, what you could od, who you could meet. Life isnt supposed to be easy. Its supposed to be hard. But lets prove to ourselves and others that we can make it. That we can succeed, that we can become stronger. Dont let the man get you down!(reply to this comment)

from Samuel Tuesday, September 19, 2006 - 08:54 (Agree/Disagree?) If you die, there are many people that will miss you. Family, friends, coworkers. You'll never know what you could have done with your life if you had just kept working at it. I will never forget the video we had in Health class about suicide. The guy summed it all up very well. He said: "Suicide is a permanent solution, to a temporary problem." Samuel Mercuri (reply to this comment)

From mia1 Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 08:59 (Agree/Disagree?) what if no one misses u? what if u don't have any friends. what if the family messed u up so much u can't have a nomal life no matter how hard u try. what if therapy doesn't work what if the only thing that keeps u living is the simple fear of dying.(reply to this comment)

From Samuel Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 18:26 (Agree/Disagree?) Everyone has friends. There are relationship experts that study friendships and relationships. They have determined that even the smallest most insignficant person on Earth has at least 7 people who think the whole world of them. Samuel Mercuri.(reply to this comment)

From mia1 Wednesday, September 20, 2006, 20:26 (Agree/Disagree?) well i don't think the world of 7 people...(reply to this comment)

From Removed Thursday, September 21, 2006, 03:32 (Agree/Disagree?) [Removed at author's request] (reply to this comment)

From Ne Oublie Thursday, September 21, 2006, 05:43 (Agree/Disagree?) I have gone to great lengths to that seven people don't think the world of me.(reply to this comment)

From Ne Oublie Thursday, September 21, 2006, 05:43 (Agree/Disagree?) *... to ensure that...(reply to this comment)

From AndyH Thursday, September 21, 2006, 07:52 (Agree/Disagree?) Is "The world" neccesarily a positive opinion? What if someone wishes you a world of hurt? (reply to this comment)

From Ne Oublie Thursday, September 21, 2006, 08:05 (Agree/Disagree?) Same response!(reply to this comment)

From AndyH Thursday, September 21, 2006, 10:44 (Agree/Disagree?) So you're saying that you go to great lengths to ensure that no one thinks either highly of you or wishes you ill will? Strange, that I've been on both ends of that spectrum, although, to be fair, that's no fault of yours. (reply to this comment)

From Ne Oublie Thursday, September 21, 2006, 11:48 (Agree/Disagree?) ... and you are not seven people :D(reply to this comment)

from vixen Tuesday, September 19, 2006 - 06:15 (Agree/Disagree?) MORNING POEM Every morning the world is created. Under the orange sticks of the sun the heaped ashes of the night turn into leaves again and fasten themselves to the high branches --- and the ponds appear like black cloth on which are painted islands of summer lilies. If it is your nature to be happy you will swim away along the soft trails for hours, your imagination alighting everywhere. And if your spirit carries within it the thorn that is heavier than lead --- if it's all you can do to keep on trudging --- there is still somewhere deep within you a beast shouting that the earth is exactly what it wanted --- each pond with its blazing lilies is a prayer heard and answered lavishly, every morning, whether or not you have ever dared to be happy, whether or not you have ever dared to pray Mary Oliver (reply to this comment)

from Removed Tuesday, September 19, 2006 - 03:22 (Agree/Disagree?) [Removed at author's request] (reply to this comment)

From afflick Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 08:36 (Agree/Disagree?) I felt the like giving up myself a few years ago. Since then, I have had a lot of change in my life, I met a wonderful man, I went to a top college and got to experience a lot that I never thought I would. These may not be someone else's highest hopes, but they were mine. And I'm glad I held on.(reply to this comment)

From Simplydone Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 04:39 (Agree/Disagree?) Thanks.(reply to this comment)

from venus_fly_trap Monday, September 18, 2006 - 22:16 (Agree/Disagree?) we've all felt that way at some point. there are plenty of threads on here about suicide. it's simply a matter of time before you pull out of it. having something to look forward to can get you through a tough night. (reply to this comment)

from mike hunt Monday, September 18, 2006 - 21:25 (Agree/Disagree?) Man Im going through the same thing. Lifes a bitch and then you die.. So fuck It all. Im just trying to work up the courage to pull the trigger. Im not scared of death, I just want It to be painless. (reply to this comment)

From PisauDarah Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 00:19 (Agree/Disagree?) If you're sure about letting them win by killing yourself, why don't you do the world a favor and take as many of those fuckers with you! If you're not scared of death, then you're the perfect tool for the job. You say life's a bitch, then you die...but it's what you make of your life, or death and what you'll be remembered for, that matters. (reply to this comment)

From Wednesday, September 20, 2006, 14:12 (Agree/Disagree?) WHAT?? GO ON A KILLING SPREE? THATS ALL THIS WORLD NEEDS ANOTHER MANIAC ON A RAMPAGE! (reply to this comment)

From Lord of the leeches Thursday, November 09, 2006, 16:06 (Agree/Disagree?) The world could use a maniac on a rampage, placed in the right location.(reply to this comment)

From Jedran Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 02:08 (Agree/Disagree?) I would be careful to giving advice like this especially on a public site such as this as it could be construed for being more than it is unless you really are telling him to go and kill as many family members as he can before he kills himself, in which case you definitely shouldn't post it on a public site.(reply to this comment)

From M&M Thursday, September 21, 2006, 06:14 (Agree/Disagree?) Sounded to me like an invite to join the US Army in Iraq.(reply to this comment)

From jordypordy Thursday, November 09, 2006, 07:54 (Agree/Disagree?) I know you guys will all hate me for this but I have to say it: I was born in a christian family and raised in "the right way".By the tim i was 13 i got really messed up.I was angry with God because i thought he was responsible for all the crap in my life, i harmed myself constantly and hid it from my parents.One day I tried 2 take my life but then a voice spoke to me. It said, "I am the living God, and I love you!" I have a feeling that all you guys were once in some cult thing that claimed to know this "Living God" I can honestly say that it sounds crap but I have experienced Him in a way that has made my life compltely new!After that experience I prayed and asked God to be my father, since then I have never looked back! He meets with me every day and I know that He loves me more than any man ever could. My life feels new and like I REALLY HAVE SOMETHING TO LIVE FOR!!!! I dare you to try it, pray and see if He really is there! Ill pray for you too, Jordan (16, UK)(reply to this comment)

From Shaka Friday, November 10, 2006, 07:42 (Agree/Disagree?) I know exactly what you mean! I used to hear that exact voice. It's Mescaline baby! The only way to fly.(reply to this comment)

From Oddman Friday, November 10, 2006, 01:47 (Agree/Disagree?) By the time you were 13... you were angry with god. You were still thinking on the basis that god is. René Descartes said "Cogito ergo sum". Ambrose Bierce said "Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum". Why did it not occur to question the very existence of god? Was that too fearful a concept? What do you know about god aside from what your parents told you, or what the bible says? Even if you choose to believe in god, you shouldn't be afraid to question his existence. There is no crime in seeking truth. Surely if god is, he would be all the more comfortable with people questioning his existence. Only the guilty fear investigation. As Thomas Jefferson said, "Question with boldness even the existence of a God; because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason, than that of blindfolded fear." (reply to this comment)

From neez Thursday, November 09, 2006, 20:40 (Agree/Disagree?) What sort of accent does this living god have?(reply to this comment)

From Oddman Thursday, November 09, 2006, 22:13 (Agree/Disagree?) I can't picture a God with a thick cockney accent. I can totally picture a God with a Patwa heavy Caribbean accent. Oi mon, believe me or barn in ell.(reply to this comment)

From Rain Child Friday, November 10, 2006, 00:32 (Agree/Disagree?) My favourite 'God' will always be Morgan Freeman.(reply to this comment)

From Oddman Friday, November 10, 2006, 01:24 (Agree/Disagree?) I might take up religion if God was Jessica Alba. At least I'd then be able to forgive God for being totally clueless and useless, but I'd still be able to worship. If God was Angelina Jolie I might even permiss God's sadistic side. Heh(reply to this comment)

From an apostate Thursday, November 09, 2006, 16:02 (Agree/Disagree?) You should start a cult. Or better yet, you can join the one that we all left. They'd love to have you. None of us miss it and none of us come onto this site, suicidal or not, to be preached the love of your lord and savior to. Kindly keep your religion off our site, and good luck with the whole growing up, finding out religion is a lie thing. Should only be a few years away at most now.(reply to this comment)

From afflick Thursday, November 09, 2006, 13:41 (Agree/Disagree?) How dare you say you were raised the "right way"! What is the right way? The Christian way? The way where you are programmed to be ashamed of yourself and your body? The way where all decisions in this very complicated, very intricate world are viewed in extremist terms? The sad fact is that many look at Christians and see only judgment and self-righteousness. You can change that, but not by more judgment and self-righteousness. Why don't you focus on compassion instead? Why don't you study your hero Jesus and model your behavior after him. He hung out with sinners and didn't judge. He did not dictate others lives for them. There is a lot of good you can do in this world. If you want to do it in the name of Jesus, do it, but really do good. If you see someone who needs compassion and sympathy and a listening ear, give it to them. Free of judgment. Don't sell your god, show your god. And that goes for the rest of you, Christian America. You have become another evil for the rest of us to endure. Please change that.(reply to this comment)

From Ne Oublie Thursday, November 09, 2006, 14:55 (Agree/Disagree?) Easy up, afflick! At least acknowledge that she had the decency to put it into quotation marks.(reply to this comment)

From afflick Thursday, November 09, 2006, 17:06 (Agree/Disagree?) Arrgh. Christianity has erked me more than usual this week. Living in a red state during election time will do that to you.(reply to this comment)

From Lord of the Leeches Thursday, November 09, 2006, 13:33 (Agree/Disagree?) Jordan, you've just proved that your pet god is useless & false. Of course you are entitled to believe what thou wilt. But if your god was anything but a figment of your imagination, he/she/it would have told you not to go spouting trash and nonsense like the above on our site. Crap your dare. We've all tried it. for years I proselytized like you now do, getting people to pray. Nothing changed their lives. I prayed so often hoping I was gonna feel some metanoia. I never did. I'm seriously tempted to offer you a good holy rolly, get you bombed out of your shell, and tell you "I am the living god & I luv you hunny". I could well use a gullible little slave to do my handiwork. (reply to this comment)

From loch Thursday, November 09, 2006, 15:23 (Agree/Disagree?) where liveth thou Leechie?(reply to this comment)

From Lord of the Leeches Thursday, November 09, 2006, 16:13 (Agree/Disagree?) Why doth thou inquire? Art thou tempted by the mention of good holy rollies, or by the mention of gullible slaves? I live in the netherworld, it's quite comfy here as we banish all the holy and saved people to heaven. I feel nothing but pity for the ignorant folk who were accosted on the streets, donated a dime and said a prayer, unwittingly purchasing a oneway ticket to a heaven of a boring place.(reply to this comment)

From Eric Cartman Thursday, November 09, 2006, 16:03 (Agree/Disagree?) Where is but a question following the function of what, and what he is, is an anonymous poster. I am not questioning your powers of observation. I am merely remarking on the paradox of asking an anonymous poster where he lives. :D(reply to this comment)

From loch Thursday, November 09, 2006, 11:29 (Agree/Disagree?) Dude, the problem is that you're 16. It's called youthful idealism.(reply to this comment)