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Getting On : Party On

An Aussie Christmas carol

from lisa - Saturday, December 11, 2004
accessed 5882 times

by kevin bloody wilson

Hey Santa claus you cunt!

Where's me fucking bike?

I've unwrapped all this other junk and there's nothing that I like.

I wrote you a fucking letter and I come to see you twice

Ya worn out geriatric fart, you forgot me fucking bike.

If I wanted a pair of bloody thongs, I'd have bloody asked.

And this cowboy suit and ping pong set you can shove right up your arse!

You've stuffed me bloody order up

It's enough to make you spew

And I'm not the only one who's snakey

Me sisters dirty too!

(female voice)
Hey santa clause you cunt!

Where's me fucking pram?

You promised me you'd bring me one, you remember who I am.

'Cause I'm the little girl who you made sit right on your hand

I'll give you fucking ho ho ho

You forgot me fucking pram

(male voice)
Next time I come to see ya, I'm gonna punch you in the guts

And I'll let your fucking reihndeer go and kick Rudolf in the nuts!

You just wait 'till next year, when you go to that store

And me and me little sister, come stomping through the door

And we'll say, yeah you wait for it

Hey mums and dads you smell his breath and check his bloodshot eyes

And don't listen to him boys and girls 'cause he tells fucking lies

He's just a piss tank and a pervert, and he's not even very bright

'Cause the old fucking wanker Forgot me fucking bike.

You wait you old cunt, I'm gonna dob you in

Tell me old man on you, he's gonna punch your fucking lights out

"I saw mummy sucking santa clause"
more Kevin Bloody Wilson Lyrics

Reader's comments on this article

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from roughneck
Friday, April 08, 2005 - 20:27

Average visitor agreement is 1 out of 5(Agree/Disagree?)
I had some time to waste, so I transcribed an mp3 I've got that's allegedly Kevin Bloody Wilson. It sure sounds like him anyway. I couldn't find any words for the track title in Google. :) Unlike Kev's usual style it isn't a song, but it's hilarious when he does it.

..Here's me and the boys, we pulled big red Roo truck up in front of McDonald's there yesterday. Big dual cab, full of garbage, shit everywhere. Truck drivers'll know what I'm talking about. Chip wrappers, coke tins, yeah shit everywhere - Full condoms with knots in them from your mum's house.

We filled up 2 big McDonald's garbage bins with the shit out of our truck. Manager walks out, he goes "what d' you think you're doing?" I said, "we're putting our McRubbish in your fucking McBin, mate, that's what we're McDoin'! And as soon as we McFinish, me and the McRowdies, we're all going in your nice clean McToilets and we're all going to pump a big McShit into each of them..- Give you back a couple McNuggets, you McFuck! Now get in there and make me a big McShitburger, and make sure it's got plenty of McMayonnaise! If it ain't McMayonnaise, you couldn't McFucking McTaste it and make sure it's gotta McSponge McWrapper McBun! I'll kick your McGarbage bins all over your pissant narrow little McFuckedup McDriveway - It ain't big enough for a McCar, I'll back me McFour-Wheel-Drive all over your pissant McFuckin McShrubs! I'll hook me McWinch on your McMenu and tow it to fuckin McFickle Harbour*! That's what I'll McDo! McFuck McOff back in there and get me a McBig McBreakfast that's McSmall! Big McBreakfast my McAss! It's a McMinute McBreakfast, with your McPowdered eggs and your McChemical McFeast! McFuck McOff back to McAmerica - coming over here and changing our McCulture! - It' ain't McFries, it's fuckin chips! it's ain't McFries, it's chips! If I McCome in here to-McMorrow and it ain't McChanged from McFries to chips, I'll cause you some serious McPain, 'cause I've been Mc... (end of recording)

*garbled somewhat
(reply to this comment)
from moon beam
Monday, December 20, 2004 - 09:27

If you like this style of humour, you'd like Roy Chubby Brown, he does some simular songs!
(reply to this comment)
from neez
Tuesday, December 14, 2004 - 14:34


A classic.. even if no one else understands it.

Jules have you got that babelfish link handy? :P
(reply to this comment)

From lisa
Thursday, December 16, 2004, 17:11

How can they not understand it? Its not that okka(reply to this comment
From Micky
Saturday, December 18, 2004, 15:38

Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5(Agree/Disagree?)

lol...i love it.

so....kevin bloody wilson

Santa's just a dirty ol' man! (reply to this comment

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