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Getting On : All My Politics


from mia1 - Sunday, April 01, 2007
accessed 1137 times

looking for advice

I'm thinking if joining the military. I would like to hear some advice from those who have joined and those who haven't. The whole nine yards, if you please. And most important, is it worth it?? Pls. ly me know ur answers soo. tks!!

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from Phoenixkidd
Thursday, April 05, 2007 - 14:14

Hillarious Smashgirl! You summed it all up. I remember talking to guys who joined the marines and navy who absolutely hated it. Mia you gotta learn to hack it in the real world. To me and don't get me wrong, Shaka and all our wonderful miltary personel here, but it seems like the military has too many young people who joined just because they were clueless and needed direction and just wanted an alternative to college. It's better to make it out on your own.
(reply to this comment)
from smashingrrl
Tuesday, April 03, 2007 - 19:59

This should sum it up for you........


I, Zoomie, swear to sign away four years of my useless life to the United States Air Force because I know I couldn't hack it in the Army and because the Marines frighten me. I swear to sit behind a desk and take credit for the work done by others more dedicated than me who take their job seriously. I also swear not to do any form of real exercise, but promise to defend our bike-riding test as a valid form of exercise.

I swear to uphold and defend the Constitution of the United States, even though I believe myself to be above that. I promise to walk around calling everyone by their first name because I know I'm not really in the military and I find it amusing to annoy the other services. I will have a better quality of life than all those around me and will at all times be sure to make them aware of that fact.

After completion of my -- snicker -- "basic training," I will be a lean, mean, doughnut-eating, lazy-boy sitting, civilian-wearing-blue-clothes, Chairborne Ranger. I will believe that I am superior to all others, and will make an effort to clean the knife before stabbing the next person in the back with it. I will do no work unless someone is watching me (and it makes me look good), will annoy those around me, and will go home early everyday.

I consent to never getting promoted -- EVER -- and understand that all those whom I made fun of yesterday probably will outrank me tomorrow.

So help me God.

Signature: ___________________ Date: _________________


I, Rambo, swear to sign away four years of my mediocre life to the United States Army because I couldn't score high enough on the ASVAB to get into the Air Force, I'm not tough enough for the Marines, and the Navy won't take me because I can't swim.

I will wear camouflage every day and tuck my trousers into my boots because I can't figure out how to use blousing straps. I promise to wear my uniform 24 hours a day even when I have a date. I will continue telling myself that I am a fierce killing machine because my drill sergeant told me I am, despite the fact that the only action I ever will see is a court martial for sexual harassment.

I acknowledge the fact that I will make E-8 in my first year of service, and vow to maintain that it is because I scored perfect on my PT test. After completion of my sexual -- er -- I mean, BASIC training, I will attend a different Army school once every other month and return knowing less than I did when I left.

On my first trip home after boot camp, I will walk around like I am cool and propose to my ninth-grade sweetheart. I will make my wife stay home, because if I let her out she might leave me for a smarter, better-looking Air Force guy. Should she leave me twelve times, I will continue to take her back.

While at work, I will maintain a look of knowledge while getting absolutely nothing accomplished. I will arrive at work every day at 1000 hours because of morning PT and leave every day at 1300 hours to report back to the "COMPANY." I understand that I will undergo no training whatsoever that will help me get a job upon separation, and will end up working construction with my friends from high school. I will brag to everyone about the Army giving me $30,000 for college, but will be unable to use it because I can't pass a placement exam.

So help me God.

Signature:__________________ Date:_______________ U.S.


I, Top Gun, in lieu of going to prison, swear to sign away four years of my life to the United States Navy because I want to hang out with Marines without actually having to BE one of them, because I thought the Air Force was too "corporate," and because I thought, "Hey, I like to swim...Why not?"

I promise to wear clothing that went out of style in 1976 and to have my name stenciled on the butt of every pair of pants I own. I understand that I will be mistaken for the Good Humor man during the summer, and for the Waffen SS during the winter. I will strive to use a different language than the rest of the English-speaking world, using words like "deck, bulkhead, cover, and head," when I really mean "floor, wall, hat, and toilet." I will take great pride in the fact that all Navy acronyms, ranks and insignia, and everything else for that matter, are completely different from the other services and make absolutely no sense whatsoever.

I will muster (whatever that is) at 0700 hours every morning unless I am buddy-buddy with the Chief, in which case I will show up around 0930 hours.

I vow to hone my coffee cup handling skills to the point that I can stand up in a kayak being tossed around in a typhoon and still not spill a drop.

I consent to being promoted and subsequently busted at least twice each fiscal year. I realize that, once selected for Chief, I am required to submit myself to the sick, and quite possibly illegal, whims of my new-found "colleagues." So help me Neptune.

Signature:__________________ Date:_______________


I, ________________ (state name here), swear...uhhhh...high-and-tight.. uhh purdy ewneeforms .. grunt... cammies... ugh... Air Force women.... HOORAH!

So help me Corps.

Thumb Print:___________________ Date:______________
(reply to this comment)

From Cycle enthusiast
Thursday, April 12, 2007, 04:01

LOL, please tell me the bit about the bike ride test is true.....(reply to this comment
From Shaka
Wednesday, April 04, 2007, 05:02

LOL, that was fucking great. (reply to this comment
From loch
Wednesday, April 04, 2007, 06:15


WOW that was freaking funny! I have two brothers in the military, one Marine, one Army. I am SO printing this out for them! HA!! Genious I say!(reply to this comment

From rainy
Wednesday, April 04, 2007, 02:53

That's great. I remember how my SAS friends used to take the piss out of the navy guys, and when they were scheduled to do something over at the navy base, the SAS guys would tease them by pretending to swim and drown in the grounds. Apparently the navy boys had to treat the buildings like ships and the land between like water or something...(reply to this comment
From Baxter
Thursday, April 12, 2007, 04:00

In the UK, RN camps are given ship's names: HMS whatever. (reply to this comment
from shikaka
Tuesday, April 03, 2007 - 19:53


Navy is generally a good choice if youre looking to never handle a weapon or sleep in the field. The ASVAB was fairly simple. Anyone with a high school education and common sense can ace it.

Being on a ship is probably the most unpleasant experience available in the navy. A floating sausage factory for months on end, with little or no privacy and constant work.

To avoid this, I went aircrew, where I was lucky enough to be an avionics tech aboard a P-3, a ground-based aircraft that cant land on ships. As such, I never set foot on a ship, and I was never a semen.

Boot camp was very easy. Think morning runs in a heated gym, heated pools, lots of class instruction and swimming. And your own personal trainers. Who make you fold your underwear.

Seriously though, I was integrated division, which means I trained with women! The marching/drill was a shambles, and imagine 25 women on the rag at any given time. Group runs were also a joke. Go Navy!

But I hated the uniforms. God, how I hated them.

(reply to this comment)

from smashingrrl
Tuesday, April 03, 2007 - 19:09


I can't really add too much to what Shaka has said. He covered the most important things.

1. Recruiters Lie. They just do. Even if they tell you they're not lying, they're still lying.

2. Not every job is what the title implies. "Aircraft Health Tech"= you're the fucker who has to empty the shitter. "Flightline Maintenance"= have fun scraping gum off tarmac for the next four years. Make sure you know what the job actually is. Your recruiter can set you up to visit a base or post and talk to people in that career field. I'd highly recommend going. It helps anyway to actually see a base, a barracks, a chowhall....etc. The movies are bullshit.

3. They'll try to get you to sign for six years by telling you that you'll come in with a higher rank. I did it. I wouldn't advise it. Six years is an awfully long time if you hate your life. Plus that's six years you have to wait to re-enlist and get the re-up bonus. The hundred dollars you'll make at the beginning won't compare.

4. Check out each and every service. Don't join the Marine Corps just 'cause they have "perty ooniforms". The jobs available, the way you're treated, length of bootcamp, college money, the life you will live vary greatly from service to service. If you have questions, ask people who've served. Feel free to email me.

5. Recruiters lie. Seriously. Someone has to fucking empty the shitter on a plane.

(reply to this comment)

from mia1
Monday, April 02, 2007 - 09:53

As far as asvab goes what is a good score?

(reply to this comment)
From Shaka
Monday, April 02, 2007, 10:47

With a GT score of 110, you are eligible for most jobs. If you have a clean record you can get a top secret clearance and get any job. A score of lower than 110 will start to eliminate possibilities. The ASVAB is an easy test. Mostly common sense. (reply to this comment
from Shaka
Monday, April 02, 2007 - 07:18


1: Your recruiter will lie to you. Don't settle for a job you don't want just because he says it's the best you can get. Hold out for what you want, you will get it eventually.

2: When you take your ASVAB, don't settle for a GT score of less than 110. If you don't make it the first time, take it again. Don't join without it. Your options will be much greater now and later if you want to change your MOS or re-enlist.

3: Don't believe your recruiter when he promises you a job that will keep you out of Iraq. It doesn't matter what MOS you are (in the army anyway), you WILL go to Iraq or Afghanistan, probably more than once. I'm the highest level of repair for the classified components of certain missile, aircraft and weapons systems. Over here I'm just another gun. If you want to be safe, join the Navy. And not as a medic or you'll go where Marines go.

4: During Basic training and AIT, take nothing personally. They don't hate you, they treat everyone the same. Just ask yourself if it's worse than a Family home and you'll be fine.

5: Go Airborne. We kick ass.
(reply to this comment)

From loch
Wednesday, April 04, 2007, 06:20

(Agree/Disagree?) little brother is Airborne! Conceited sons-of-bitches aren't ya?(reply to this comment
From Shaka
Wednesday, April 04, 2007, 11:15


We rock. That is all.

What unit is ur bro in?(reply to this comment

From loch
Wednesday, April 04, 2007, 06:20

(Agree/Disagree?) little brother is Airborne! Conceited sons-of-bitches aren't ya?(reply to this comment
From mia1
Monday, April 02, 2007, 10:03

By the way could u call me??(reply to this comment
From sarafina
Monday, April 02, 2007, 10:21


He's in Iraq right now Mia. Maybe when he gets home, when are you thinking of Joining? (reply to this comment

From mia1
Wednesday, April 04, 2007, 12:03

I have about 3 months after I take the GED before I actually can take the asvap so there is time. I just wanted info. Mainly was it worth it for the benifits.
Call me if u like.
[Removed at author's request] (reply to this comment
From Albert Phish
Wednesday, April 04, 2007, 13:14

You are so right, PM and email are just there for decoration. The public threads are just the place to pass around phone numbers. Why not make your credit card numbers and social security number public while you're at it?(reply to this comment
From mia1
Wednesday, April 04, 2007, 16:44

sorry, my bad. How would I go about removing the comment then?(reply to this comment
From Shaka
Monday, April 02, 2007, 09:24

And yes, for me it's been worth it. (reply to this comment

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