Thursday, January 27, 2005 - 01:51
Josiah was a BIG EXCEPTION (aka HYPOCRITE) in the eyes of Zerby and co. In the early 90's Josiah carried on a sexual relationship with me & did everything but penetration. This was after the Charter when the rules were finally strict between teen and adult sex. And I was not the only girl around that he "liked to get it on with". There were girls ranging from 15-18 that he was "regulars" with. And it wasn't very secretive either. He had a real facination with breasts and would often fondle girls' breast in public and pull up their shirts. I know that there are a lot of people who remembers this.
I was not attracted to Josiah - he was an old man! But since he was a CRO, and was VERY push, it was hard to push him away. I would do everything to avoid being around when he was drunk (remember this was totally against the Charter - the alchohol limits were slim, but he was an expection to this) and would also avoid "ending up" in dark alone places where he might find me. When I would try to get out of it and quote the rules and remind him that it wasn't allowed, he would use his "I'm leadership, it's ok" explanation. This caused a lot of confusion for me.
Josiah was a horny/dirty old man who couldn't get his hands off any young girl around. I know there are a lot of girls out there who have stories to tell about him.
Then Mary Mom (his wife) found out and got upset. She asked to talk to me (and she can be scarry). Josiah managed to get ahold of me before my "talk" and told me to tell Mary that he had never gone below my waist, and only kissed and fondled my breasts. He said that he had gotten "speacial permission from Mama and Peter to fondle young girls' breasts, cause it was a weakness of his." He just couldn't abstain, so they finally told him if he kept it above the waist he wouldn't get in trouble. Oh my God!!! WTF?!?!! How could WS make someone an exeption to the rules - and say that an old man could play around with young girls?!?!?
He was a pervert and did everything to me but penetrate! Here's this big ass leader telling me to lie to cover his ass.
So I go finally go in to have my talk with Mary, and there's both Mary and Josiah holding hands looking at me with total disdain. Mary cross examined me about my sexual relations with her philadering husband, and I managed to stick to the "only above the waist" line that I had been scarred into giving. During that talk I had never felt so low and forsaken. She rebuked me for being a temptation to Josiah and told me that my past health problems was a direct punishment from God for what I had done. She took it all out on me and Josiah just sat there like a wet fish and let me take all the flack. First he abuses me, then asks me to lie to cover his ass, and then he lets me take all the flack. Jerk!
I felt so low and dirty. Accusing a victim of abuse of being the perpertrator is one of the lowest things a human can do. I sat there in front of two of the biggest leaders around and was meant to feel like the biggest sinner in the world.
Mary reported it to Peter and Maria while I waited to hear back what the punishment was going to be.
The next night Josiah paid me a visit in the middle of the night. He woke me up trying to get into my bed. He was only wearing a shirt (no underware) and had alchohol on his breath. I was shocked! The gull he had! I kicked him out!
The next day both Mary and Josiah informed me that Peter and Mama had decided to not punish us for breaking the rules. The punishment should have been a 6month excommunication (babes status). But since Josiah was an important leader and valuable to the Lords work, he wouldn't be required. And if I went to babes status everyone would find out why, and they didn't want anyone to know what Josiah had done. They said it "could stumble the sheep". I was told I was lucky that it had been with a CRO, otherwise there wouldn't have been an exception to the punishment. I was swarn to never ever voice anything about the event. And I never did - until now.
This always proved to me that the Family is all about double standards for their leadership and "chosen" - just like society that they claim to be so above. They cover up when it suits them, but lets the little sheep hang out to burn. How many single moms have they put out on the street because they seased to be useful? The Family leadership is just as currupt as any other organization or business. How can they claim to be "above the law", "God's chosen", "Perfect society", "A loving place". Oh please - it's the hipochrosy that makes me the most furious!
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