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Personal Accounts

The following are first hand personal accounts from survivors of abuse as children in The Family

192 accounts.
Page 19 of 20

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Original Location

Dr.4_Shure - Wednesday, February 02, 2005

Here I was the son of a single mom, getting tagged along to every “road trip” that she had to go on.
I remember so vividly sences of horror, when a adult man would hand me a Balloon to try and keep my attention distracted , away from him and mom totally naked on the bed while he had his hands totally up ‘hers’ on the edge of the bed. Holly F**k it was, my head reached up to about just that height. Not to mentioned the rooms were crummy places worth 5$ a night, but they had somehow manage to (PTL!) provision.
I remember waking up crying and screaming my guts out endless night, that she had a new man in bed with her, and the uncle would come over and scold me on how I should not fear as there's "no fear in perfect love". " Oh! did you have another nightmare!"" well let me pray for you" was the only response I'd get until they finally moved me out to sleep in the childrens room on a bunkbed. Resulting from this I never ever wanted to sleep in my moms room ever again in my life, turn out rebellious at a young age, it was so repulsive.
My mom was TF's whore.

Original Location

aphrodite - Wednesday, February 02, 2005

I think the family aunties were in many cases worse than the men. The abuse is on another level with women. It takes that much more of a horrible woman to abuse children, men think about sex etc, women can control that much more and so have even less of an excuse when it comes to abuse.

I have many terrible memories towards vindictive family aunties who really just had it out for you.

Not to mention the fact that many kids had to watch their mothers go FF'ing, "where is mommy" lead to the reply that she was taking care of the fish, some mothers took their children with them to catch the "fish's" attention inititally.

Original Location

cocomojo - Wednesday, February 02, 2005

Gypsy nights, romantic nights, sharing schedules, "sexual education".

Has anyone else found the Brazilian "brothers and sisters" to have a bit of an edge on the perversion game?

I remember a real pervert an Argentine who went by the name Palito, or Santiago, my sister used to tell me what he made her do to him, her friends as well. Mostly during the weekly ride to the school home. He was a non sexual abuser too, my brother and I can attest to that.

The biggest problem is that most of us never knew the real names of our tormentors. Now they live some cushy life somewhere, and I don't doubt that the're truly happy as they think back on the "good ol' days".

BTW this particular abuser was one of the most liked person for us kids, as he was one of the nicest people you could meet. He was funny, kind, and a real joker. Whenever he wasn't showing off "God's love". How twisted is that? That a child can put aside, or compartmentalize the sexual aspects of someones abusive behaviour in favor of their part-time personality. It just shows how bad the daily mental abuse was.

Original Location

conan - Wednesday, February 02, 2005


While I was very shocked that the above question and subsequent answer were published in TF, I can't really say that the issue itself was all that uncommon.

Let me clarify that remark for a second. I didn't see incest being openly condoned like Berg was obviously doing here, but sexual relationships being not only common around young children, but the children themselves becoming a "problem" for being in the way or god forbid wanting some attention while mom and uncle "Abel Seamen" or whatever retarded names these culties had, were busy "sharing" god's love with eachother.

My earliest memories are also from the age of 3-5 but only a few isolated incedents before 4 to 4-1/2.

Memories of viewing sexual activity on a regular scale as a child is something that plagued me in my early teen and pre-teen years but was then largely surpressed among my many repressed memories that will pop back into memory from time to time. One thing that will always remain clearly defined in my mind is that we children were abligated to watch but to "behave" while the adults were busy copulating.

If we were good while watching we would be "rewarded" with the potential of our own sharing night for our age group as well as the occasional "sharing experience" with an aunt (or uncle I guess too) in the home. I felt terrible after reading the posted article for how Ruthie's child must have turned out until I remembered that it could have been any one of us. The audacity TF has to still claim that there was never wide-spread condoned sexual (and other) abuses is just too obtuse for words.

I hope there is some form of an afterlife, just so that we can rest assured that Berg is burning for all eternity for his crimes agains humanity and his blatant disregard for the value of human life (our lives). Zerby will get her's one day and when that happens the relief will be amazing.

Original Location

Nick - Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Funny that you post this as just last night I was talking to my GF about this very thing.

While a lot of us, especially us men, were not personally sexually abused I think its safe to say that all of us were at some point subjected to some pretty traumatizing sexual scenes.

Do you know how upsetting it can be for a small child to be 3 ft away in the next bed while mummy is forced to have sex with some ugly single brother? And not just one, but every man in the home seems to pass through your room at some point and you have to watch it all. This can be very traumatizing for a young child. Especially when you know that your parents don’t want to and are being forced to.

I am a father and I cringe at the thought of having my son lie in the next bed from his mom banging some idiot she doesn’t even like.
I was always very uncomfortable as a child when your group walks into the bathroom to wash hands before dinner and there is some perverted uncle having a shower with a hard on and a big grin on his face casually showering as these poor kids forced to accept their perverted “freedoms”.

Original Location

exer - Tuesday, February 01, 2005

It gets even worse, Jules, as this quote from "Answers To Your Questions!—No. 5 (DFO 1458 4/83) shows. It's found on page 27 of "Good News Book IV."

51. QUESTION: MY LITTLE BOY (5 YEARS OLD) IS VERY SEXY! He cannot even hug his mother without getting a hard on. So I thought it was bad because it makes him too familiar with his mother if she takes care of him. I believe somebody else would take care of him, but until now, no one in the Home has the burden to do this. What do you, Dad, think of this kind of mother & child relationship?—Sammy, Europe

ANSWER: What’s wrong with it? It’s perfectly natural!—What better person to learn about sex from than his own dear mother?–God’s only Law is Love! (See Nos.605:4, 779, 782, 815 & SD "My Little Fish")—Are you a jealous father?

Original Location

NClaunch - Tuesday, February 01, 2005

My earliest memory: I was about 2 or 3 maybe. There was a group of us kids who were supposed to be sitting around in our chairs watching my mother give Matthew ( John PI) a blow job. This was in Marianne's home in the Phillippines. The same home (and the same man) my 14 year old sister got pregnant in/from. I asked my mother about it some time later when i remembered and she said: well, you were supposed to be watching but you guys were all running all over the place.

Original Location

katrim4 - Tuesday, February 01, 2005

This is why it gets to me when the family claims that abuse wasn't widespread and that it was just "a few isolated cases". If it was really just a few isolated cases, then why is it that you remember stuff happening in the Phillipines and I have eerily similar memories from Mexico? I don't know what time period you're reffering to, but that's not really the point. The point is that all of these homes all around the world were following the same "council" from Berg and doing very similar things. And then when they were done doing them, they were sending in their testimonies, questions and tips straight to Berg and Zerby and they either condoned it (as with the case above) or they put a stop to it (like happened with Keda and the Homo's letters). If they really were all that concerned about it, why didn't they stop it way back then when they got the very first reports of this stuff happening? Obviously child sex and adult/child sex was deemed more appropriate than gasp......homosexuality!

From what I understand, Marianne's home was a rather large home, probablly with a ton of kids. The combo that I'm refering to, in Guadalajara in the early '80's must've had at least 100 - 200 people there at any given time. And the more people there were, the bigger the orgies were. I lived there when I was 5 & 6 (making the year 1983-1984) and there was absolutly no attempt made to shield or protect children from all of the sexual activity that was taking place. Seek and Secundus would make dance videos, host gypsy nights, etc., etc. How many cases does there have to be, involving how many people, before it becomes widespread?

Original Location

- Tuesday, February 01, 2005

OMG, Jules, that comment has clarified things worth 5 years of therapy. I have similar reactions about the abuse from men versus women. While the obvious incidents of abuse that shock the outside world tend to get more attention, I think that what shredded my pysche the worst was the constant demeaning and humiliation which as you point out seemed to come from the women, at least in my case as a preteen and teenage girl.

When I think of your observation that they did this because they viewed us as competitors while we matured, I think of a woman from whom I got years of opression and degradation, and how curiously she would go from younger man to younger man, while sending me and other 12 year olds to sleep with her husband who was several years older than the average adult Family member then and with whom she must have been bored. I witnessed her stealing one woman's family from her and claiming it as her own. I since heard how she stole the father from another family. I guess she didn't only view little girls as competitors.

Original Location

- Sunday, January 30, 2005

hey grendel,

i remember him.

I hate him. He mentally and sexually abused me when i was 11...

Years later, im finding it hard to deal with the things that happened, and its effecting my relationship too.. my boyfriend also finds it hard to accept, and wishes i had done something about it, but i was / am to scared to speak out..

If anybody else has or knows anybody else thats been abused by lucas, please come forward..

192 accounts.
Page 19 of 20

1-10 | 11-20 | 21-30 | 31-40 | 41-50 | 51-60 | 61-70 | 71-80 | 81-90 | 91-100 | 101-110 | 111-120 | 121-130 | 131-140 | 141-150 | 151-160 | 161-170 | 171-180 | 181-190 | 191-192
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