looking for, January 25, 2005, 01:04
Can't Find Article
Where are the internal memos from TF about recent events? There seem to be so many articles lately that they are moving out of "New Content" and I miss or can't find things. Thanks.  (reply to this post)

Vicky, January 25, 2005, 01:26
Ricky
All articles pertaining to Ricky are posted in the In Remembrance section. Look under the heading, Getting Through.
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Jules, January 19, 2005, 07:52
Mike Hunt
Please can you email me. I need to contact you and the email address you registered with does not work.   (reply to this post)

pharmaboy, December 22, 2004, 05:00
Having fun
There is this new marshal in our department, and he's taken it upon him to see to it that I am kept busy at all times. Thing is, I've been 11 months in this office, so although younger than him, I know the ropes of this office much better.

The other marshalls here have understood that unless there is a big problem, ie a server problem, or anything that would risk reaching higher levels of command, they are not to bother me. I'm not their errand boy, I'm an experienced all-round IT techie, in other words. Now this stupid cock-sucker hasn't got this way of doing things yet.

So I'm there doing my thing, helping out an officer, and he comes three times in five minutes to ask what I was doing.

It wasn't what he said, it was the way he said it, add to the mix that my head was elsewhere, totally absorbed in what I was doing, and there is this pitiful excuse for a life filling my head with incoherent white noise. So I come down to earth, and look at the source of the disturbance. and told him to please fuck off and find someone else to bother. He starts yelling, and I still couldn't quite get everything he said, he loved an excuse to blow up, and so did I to be honest, and he talked about a lot of topics ranging from communists to my mother to comments on places where the sun don't shine. It was the bad acting that really bothered me now, for fuck's sake, if you're going to blow up and make a show of yourself in front of people, at least put on a good show! That's the whole fun of flying into a rage, the opportunity to put on an entertaining display of rabid insanity, because there is rarely anything worth getting truly angry over. I had to put an end to his poor show, so I put my finger to my lips and calmly said, "shhh", then put both hands and in the air and started waving them and said, "can't you hear the music?". Marshall, let's call him Billy for this story, just got angrier and more pathetic, little bits of spittle flying from between his rotten teeth. I said shh again, and then said "you're disturbing my biorythm, and when that happens, I lose all reason and might do something... crazy", then I sort of shook my whole body and made a horrid face, imitating a seizure. Life is a game isn't it? This was all a game after all, it's all about playing/acting it out, like playing charades.

Billy takes me to the colonel, and accuses me of blah, blah, blah. I then tell the colonel that it's just a personality clash and suggest we have group therapy for the whole department, for maybe just the two us should go for marriage counselling. The colonel, anxious to return to the lines of code on his screen, sends us away exhorting us to "solve our own problems". End of story.

As of late, after a year of guaranteed food and pay, regardless of work performance, I don't give a fuck. I have a secret wish to be punished, physically, beaten, made to do manual labour till exhaustion. Just anything to get me to move somewhere.

You think I actually give a shit about this place? I think the only thing that would do it justice would be a natural disaster.

You think I'll cut down part of me to obtain small favours, take shit to be able to go home on weekends, or the priviledge of working in a cosy office? Once you start taking shit, waiting for your discharge, your promotion, your leave pass, you keep doing it for the rest of your miserable life. You'll become the dog that has been beaten down so many times it doesn't need to be beaten anymore, it comes to it's master and obediently waits for the beating it thinks it deserves. You'll be reduced to quietly grumbling about management, your boss or your government with co-workers at coffee-break, never saying "enough is enough", because you'll risk losing the few crumbs are getting at the end of the day. Beaten, skinny dogs begging for a few bones from the same hand that cruelly beat them. How pathetic is that?

Slavery wasn't abolished out of charity, slave have nothing to lose, and thus are dangerous and hard to control. Better to give them an illusion of freedom, and let them work for crumbs. Sure, you can go any time you want, but how will you feed your family once you're out in the cold? You can get a mercenary to do far more than a draftee, as long as he can get by month to month, he'll eat shit and soon start believing it's caviar. None of this is explicit, it's understood.

Unspoken words yell louder than anything said aloud.

You must be so careful with your head, it's a delicate biocomputer that reprogrammes itself to adapt to the enviornment. If you're not careful, you will get programmed by others, and you won't even realize it until it's too late. You'll just wake up one morning and find you can't recognize yourself anymore. The   (reply to this post)

Fish, December 27, 2004, 04:49
too true
Sad but very true. Keep on pissing the world off, and I will give thee a crown of cardboard.
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MM, December 16, 2004, 10:03
Are you looking for something real?
Poor u man, get a life, hey smoke WEED dude, maybe youll have more fun, and slit your tongue since you dont need word...good luck by the way doing 180bshit whatever,.Get Realy  (reply to this post)

pharmaboy, December 18, 2004, 07:42
Thanks, but I think stick with loud, numbing music, it keeps me level
Mmm, and how about me smoking weed and mixing? Maybe you should talk less and study english grammar more, mommy wouldn't be happy if she caught you smoking weed and posting nonsense on the net instead of doing your homework, don't you think?





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pharmaboy, December 2, 2004, 06:19
145bpm...
I got a Beringher mx200 and a couple gemini cdjs, hook that up to a pc with timestamp cds, rebirth and Traktor..I locked myself away for 4 days with this setup, mixing squatter techno and psy trance...my mind now computes in 4/4, and i think in speeds ranging from 140 to 180bpm.

I keep asking myself, while wandering the deserted town heading to the mall for CD-Rs, why the hell they don't play psy as background music in all public areas, in and outdoor? It's should be the soundtrack to life, it is life, it's life past opinions, ideologies, sense. Music with vocals just gets too opinionated, just one cliché after the next: bitches, money, ghetto life, peace, love, he said, she said, social utopia, blah blah blah.

Then there is the music that doesn't have the need for answers or opinions, it doesn't care, why should it and for what? It just is, that's enough of a justification. In writing these few lines I've already betrayed it, it doesn't like to be analyzed or commented on, it just wants to be played, it has no beginning or end it flows like a river, or like lava...why? why is there such dedication to this indefinable absurdity? Who the fuck are all these people, braving cold, heat, rain and cops just to get bombarded by this sonic abomination? Every scene has it's ideals, it's reasons, what's the meaning of this one, I'm trying hard to understand it?

Then one of the silent, hooded ones turns away from the onslaught and catches one of your inquisitive stares. A laughing sparkle in his eyes, and an imperceptible grin on his lips as he sways to the music and playfully shakes his finger at you as if to say, "there are something’s that just can't be explained... you talk and think and pretend too much, shut up and just be, the music is playing."

shhhh..
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Joe H, December 5, 2004, 19:24
Whoa
Somebody needs a girlfriend.
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pharmaboy, December 6, 2004, 02:30
:-P
Wasn't that your famous problem? :-)
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The Pedantic Prick, December 6, 2004, 19:02
Oh, I've got girlfriend troubles...
but the lack of a girlfriend is not one of them.
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neez, December 5, 2004, 14:36
(insert Pharmaboy using the Traktor joke) :P
New version of Traktor wit FinalScratch support is 'coming soon'. & they finally let u record ur mix to the HD :o
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