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Getting Through : Creative Writing

Forgetting To Remember

from madly - Friday, September 07, 2007
accessed 853 times

Something... not sure what. Then again, maybe nothing.

Truths stare from the shadows
A nightmare too familiar for but a dream
Questions ask and answers whisper
Denial hides his face in fear of discovery

Too late to remember to forget
Your heart trembles as your mind races
A glimpse looming as if watching for the chance
A haunting memory of a past not yours

Then it looks at you, for it is you
Your darkness conscientiously hidden in a false light
Your past, the broken memories,
You have mended and covered in false gold

Can memories become a contrived fantasy?
Can we remember as we have craved it to be?
A heightened conceived reality of a past once lived
The truth blurry if there at all

With memories rearranged or created at will
Can you lose the pain connected?
Can you play the game and win where you have lost,
Treasuring the mind's trick of delusion?

Who is to question your chosen reality?
Who is to argue its given falsification?
Your memory seeks no permission of a preferred form
You own the creation, for it is formed by you

The vicious cycle eats at me
Can I live with a memory that kills me?
Or, if I kill it, will I die and live on as someone else?
Do I need that part of me or am I better off a stranger?

He is still looking, waiting, watching
I stand alone, stronger this time, but still afraid to face him
Can I overtake him, kill him off, once again,
Bury him away, so deeply, that I might live and die before he returns?

I hear the whispers louder; the shadows grow closer
Ghosts of my past forever haunting my present
Can I remember to forget?
Or is it too late to forget to remember?

Reader's comments on this article

Add a new comment on this article

from Kelly
Thursday, September 20, 2007 - 05:13

(Agree/Disagree?)
madly, what can I say?......I’m guessing.... you know how I feel about this poem ;-)
(reply to this comment)
from madly
Tuesday, September 11, 2007 - 18:45

(Agree/Disagree?)
Beautifully put. I do feel like a glass trying to contain a river, if not an ocean. Don’t you feel this way too? I just don’t understand how you felt that from my words.
(reply to this comment)
from nix
Sunday, September 09, 2007 - 15:14

Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5(Agree/Disagree?)

It's like a glass trying to hold a river. I like it alot.


(reply to this comment)

From madly
Tuesday, September 11, 2007, 18:46

(Agree/Disagree?)
ooops, that comment above yours, was meant to be placed here.(reply to this comment
from vix
Sunday, September 09, 2007 - 06:40

(Agree/Disagree?)

I like this very much.


(reply to this comment)

from fragiletiger
Sunday, September 09, 2007 - 02:51

(Agree/Disagree?)

I love the phraselogy in this, good to see the insomnia is paying off creatively. :)


(reply to this comment)

from mad dreamer
Friday, September 07, 2007 - 21:53

Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5(Agree/Disagree?)
Now you've got me thinking. Does it mess things up when we try to reconstruct the fragmented memories of our past? I mean, here I am trying to find out what and who I am and the further back I go the harder it is to piece together my past. And I always fear that by doing that I inevitably interpolate, creating new, tainted memories that only end up making me someone I'm not.

It's as if in the process of self-discovery, I am creating the person I will eventually discover.

Like you said, the vicious cycle eats at me. [sigh]
(reply to this comment)
From madly
Friday, September 07, 2007, 23:25

(Agree/Disagree?)

I believe The Beatles said it best:

"Yesterday,
All my troubles seemed so far away,
Now it looks as though they're here to stay,
Oh, I believe in yesterday.

Suddenly,
I'm not half the man I used to be,
There's a shadow hanging over me,
Oh, yesterday came suddenly.

Why she
Had to go I don't know, she wouldn't say.
I said,
Something wrong, now I long for yesterday.

Yesterday,
Love was such an easy game to play,
Now I need a place to hide away,
Oh, I believe in yesterday."


(reply to this comment

From madly
Friday, September 07, 2007, 23:34

(Agree/Disagree?)
Okay, I was just joking... I have no idea how that song applies, just thought of it for some reason. I will think on it. Nite. :)(reply to this comment
From mad dreamer
Friday, September 07, 2007, 23:39

(Agree/Disagree?)
That's ok. I like that song a lot. It's the kind of song I find myself whistling the tune to every once in a lonely while.(reply to this comment
from mad dreamer
Friday, September 07, 2007 - 21:10

(Agree/Disagree?)
Love it! Love it! Love it! Love it! Love it! Love it! Love it!

Did I say that enough times?

I like most of what you have posted on movingon, but this is my #1 favorite. You f**king ROCK, girl!!
(reply to this comment)
From madly
Saturday, September 08, 2007, 22:16

Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5(Agree/Disagree?)
Why do you love so much of what I write, when most of what I say is utter crazy nonsense with little value or meaning? Could it be that you believe to find in me something you are lacking, something you seek and believe I have? Don’t you realize that I am someone who has thus far failed in learning how to live? Don’t admire me, for I am lost and rarely content. Don’t be fooled by what I say, because my words are as empty as I have found my heart to be. I offer no wisdom, only madness.
(reply to this comment
From mad dreamer
Sunday, September 09, 2007, 02:27

Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5Average visitor agreement is 5 out of 5(Agree/Disagree?)
I am not looking for answers or wisdom from you. It is the madness, the unpretentiousness, and the passion of your thoughts that I love.

What I find in your comments is the expression of a mind that is not willing to resign itself to its past, and chooses instead to explore its full potential in its own raw, vulnerable way. You pursue an unattainable wisdom with abandon. That quality alone, in my opinion, means you have learned to live better than most people on this planet.

If loving your madness makes me mad, then so be it.(reply to this comment
From fragiletiger
Sunday, September 09, 2007, 02:49

(Agree/Disagree?)

Along with the (Agree/Disagree) rating we need a creepiness rating. I give this comment and this user in general a 5 thumbs.

(reply to this comment

From mad dreamer
Sunday, September 09, 2007, 12:23

(Agree/Disagree?)
Yeah. I think I'd give myself 5 thumbs up for sounding creepy, too.

Can I get 5 thumbs up from you for being insane also? How 'bout another 5 for being too emotional?(reply to this comment
From thatata
Sunday, September 09, 2007, 12:47

Average visitor agreement is 1 out of 5(Agree/Disagree?)

C'mon, youre asking us to flatter you right? I know some people take pride in being insane as well as emotional some people even take pride in being stupid, its all mess isnt it, ha ha ha! (Yeah, not funny)( shouldnt have laughed).

What an asshole in fact. Yes I should be ashamed. Why do I walk around, no I dont walk around, I swim in my head, I eat cabbage, no I dont, I eat meat, I wail in the bathroom, no I dont, I feel emotionless, like Iron Man, I am the man wish to walk ten feet tall stomp on you all, no Im a sensitive creature, no one understands, Im just that misunderstood creature romantically posing in front of the mirror,"WHAT A LUDICROUS FUCK", ha ha ha, even the laughter is not funny enough, if u like "I "and "we" will degrade ourselves more, in verbosity and insincere sincirety, "The Debaser", take that bitch! sorry for my profanity, I get carried away, and its never enough words get more false as they go on. And I cringe at my words.

But remeber Im only being insincere.(reply to this comment

From madly
Sunday, September 09, 2007, 14:31

(Agree/Disagree?)

Sounds more like you are being an asshole to me. What the hell is always so funny to you anyway? If you are insincere and have no desire to stand by your comments, then why be offensive for no reason? (reply to this comment

From thatata
Monday, September 10, 2007, 06:14

(Agree/Disagree?)

Why would I not want to stop at a thought? - Because I think.

Why would I want to be offensive for no reason? Do you really think Im being offensive for no reason? And if Im being offensive for no reason, is that even possible? Perhaps Im not "being" offensive but you take offense, and offense at something thats not even, directly directed at you. Why the outrage? But most probally I was trying to offend, though in mine opinion its more like "disagree". But youre right I was being an asshole , sorry!

As far as sincerity goes, how sincere is anyone who truly thinks, and watches his actions and thoughts? Sincerity inevitably turns into insincerity.Insincerity is like the evolution of sincerity, I know Im being slighty facetious, yet I think of this as having a kind of truth too. Anyways I am an idiot so dont take me seriously!

And like a selfserving asshole I even have a quotation:

"What is exhilarating in bad taste is the aristocratic pleasure of giving offense." - Charles Baudelaire(reply to this comment

From Just wondering...
Sunday, September 09, 2007, 14:11

(
Agree/Disagree?)

who you are talking to, MD or madly? You know they are different people, right?(reply to this comment

From thatata
Monday, September 10, 2007, 06:16

(Agree/Disagree?)
I was talking to mad dreamer, mabye there was a misunderstanding... who knows, sorry about that.(reply to this comment

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