|
|
Getting Through : Creative Writing
My Emo Moment | from fragiletiger - Monday, April 30, 2007 accessed 1198 times OK I know that, seeing as I just bagged vixen for doing it, it's a bit rich for me to go and change my articule. But hey, the other version sucked. Their blind adoration for beauty They adore you, strangely unique Yet sad, too weird to fit blithely Cynical, but not unfeeling Your sanity another sideshow Madness on display for mocking Your voice is too loud in their ears Your laugh is to harsh in their ears Your words are to vulgar in their ears Your jokes to bitter in their ears Never quite right, never quite wrong The monster of childhood nightmares A lust for beautiful minds to tear into Watching them jerk with emotion (See how I use my words?) To heal you, to save you To give them their happy ending This bottle's done, unnatural violation That it should be so empty |
|
|
|
Reader's comments on this article Add a new comment on this article | from Kelly Monday, June 18, 2007 - 14:02 (Agree/Disagree?) My heart, I hope you know If you are happy That is meaning for me I want you to know If you have meaning That is happiness for me I want/hope you (to) know If you are happy And have meaning --I’ll never stand in your way (reply to this comment)
| From Samuel Saturday, June 23, 2007, 05:59 (Agree/Disagree?) Pay no attention to cheeks, Kelly, I thought your poem was great, even if it is a tad simple. Does poetry have to be complex to be good? I think not. And Lisa, I don't know when you changed your article, but I like this one better than the one it replaced. You have some talent. One last thing, Happy Birthday, Moonbeam!(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | | | | | From Samuel Monday, June 25, 2007, 17:19 (Agree/Disagree?) Cheeks, I still think most of the poetry on the site lately stinks. I just thought Kelly's was pretty good, especially when viewed against the other recent poetry on here. Kelly's poem had a nice, warm, fuzzy feeling to it- and I liked that. I like the kinder, gentler poetry. It appears that you didn't, and you have a right to that opinion. In contrast, there was a poem posted on here yesterday by an unknown person that looked almost like a suicide note. My hope is that that person was just having a bad day, and this site allowed them to vent their anger and frustration. (reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | From placebo Tuesday, June 26, 2007, 10:04 (Agree/Disagree?) Yes because Kelly's primary schoolesque stanza outshone other recent works like let's say live-fast-die-young's recent efforts? If you want "kinder, gentler poetry" may I suggest Blue's clues to you. Lastly, like cheeks, you're entitled to your own opinion when it comes to the arts, however if you were born in Sparta they would have left you on a hill...(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | from madly Saturday, June 16, 2007 - 19:55 (Agree/Disagree?) Hey, frag, do me a favor and post this up on the main site where everyone will see it. It is too good to be left down here. Don’t worry about cheeks, she will get over it when the contractions hit, plus she is a closet poetry fanatic anyway. (reply to this comment)
| | | from Kelly Saturday, June 16, 2007 - 17:03 (Agree/Disagree?) WTF is up with that? (reply to this comment)
| from Kelly Saturday, June 16, 2007 - 17:01 (Agree/Disagree?) i really got something speical from that (reply to this comment)
| from Kelly Saturday, June 16, 2007 - 17:01 (Agree/Disagree?) i really got something speical from that (reply to this comment)
| from Kelly Saturday, June 16, 2007 - 17:01 (Agree/Disagree?) i really got something speical from that (reply to this comment)
| from Kelly Saturday, June 16, 2007 - 16:59 (Agree/Disagree?) Is that how come there is something instead of nothing FT? (reply to this comment)
| from Simon Cowell Wednesday, May 02, 2007 - 19:13 (Agree/Disagree?) Frag, the poem was very nice. Not a bad start, you expressed how you felt in a beautiful way. (reply to this comment)
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | From fragiletiger Friday, June 15, 2007, 01:21 (Agree/Disagree?) I'm not sure if this is a clever comment, or if your accusing me of not having written this. If its the latter then I have to say, it is true I did not come up with every single word or line in this poem. This is actually, a recounting of a conversation I had with a friend whom I love. These words are the ones that went round and round in my head, for a year untill I finally let them out. (reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | | | | | From idiots anonymous Tuesday, June 26, 2007, 14:33 (Agree/Disagree?) Wow! You are stooooooooooooooooooopid!!! "In case anyone besides me cares, the lines I didn’t write are: A lust for beautiful minds to tear into Watching them jerk with emotion (See how I use my words?) This bottle's done, unnatural violation That it should be so empty" That's the post that the reader 'Kelly' so grossly commented on, and which you clearly have trouble following along with as well. If you think that the introductory sentence from fragiletiger in the above quoted comment were what Kelly commented on as 'good with words' than you don't follow a comprehensive thought well. If Kelly was commenting on that first line, she has no taste in words and will never appreciate poetry or literature. I personally found that the words Kelly commented on were more likely "A lust for beautiful minds to tear into Watching them jerk with emotion (See how I use my words?) This bottle's done, unnatural violation That it should be so empty" which tiger mentioned as having plagiarized but can certainly be seen as being 'beautiful words'. If I'm right about what she intended to comment on, then you're doubly the moron. If I missed what Kelly was commenting on, then perhaps she should be more specific. Either way, you're wrong...and an idiot(reply to this comment) |
| | From fragiletiger Wednesday, June 27, 2007, 01:52 (Agree/Disagree?) As I said this whole for lack of a better word 'poem' is actually taken from a conversation. When I was putting it together, I struggle to find other words that weren't her's to put in their place, but hers fit, they where the end of the conversation, it was a melding of our twos voices, talking both about each other and ourselves. So my questions is, plagiariziem, where is the line drawn? How would you use someone else's words and not have it be plagiriziem? How do you correctly credit them as the author? If you both come up with the idea as in the first line( A lust for beautiful minds to tear into ) and together arive at the words and thought, who has the right to those words? Can you plagerize spoken word? (reply to this comment) |
| | From idiots anonymous Sunday, July 01, 2007, 15:39 (Agree/Disagree?) I wasn't so much accusing you of plagiarizing as I was trying to make the point about following a conscious thought that was in written form, and knowing what was being written. You did follow up your post of the quote by admitting it wasn't (entirely) your words, and so technically you were giving credit to another voice, albeit haphazardly. I happen to have liked the poem, and the lines you 'borrowed' and wasn't commenting on quality of content or a general like or dislike. I was being a dick. That being said, you can indeed plagiarize spoken word but it can be hard to prove. Like I said earlier, you did give a passing credit to 'someone else', and as such I wasn't really accusing you of stealing someone else's words and thoughts as your own, but trying to make a point about reading something thoroughly before trying to comment, or to at least be clear as to your intentions of what you're referring to when you do comment.(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | | | | | from madly Wednesday, May 02, 2007 - 12:39 (Agree/Disagree?) I wish you would have more of these ‘emo’ moments. If you want to be embarrassed, you are going to have to try a lot harder. That was beautiful. I only wish you had have posted it on the main page, so that cheeks could enjoy it. :P (reply to this comment)
| | |
|
|
|
|