Silent Screams

from cyborcosmic - Wednesday, December 04, 2002
accessed 1631 times

Inside my mind and soul

Inside my mind :
a suppressed scream
Inside my soul:
desire and hurt intertwined
Outside I only show you.
Inside I really know you.
I''m asking
you to believe the false signals I fake.
''The body never lies''
but it has learned to.

My expectation of you was misinformed
and incomplete.
I was deceiving myself by pretending you cared
Even though I knew you were just
another empty promise I had made to myself,
I was still holding on to your words:
" I care about you ."

Throughout my past
I felt aversion, guilt and terrible
shame
It''s a different feeling than love or
pain.
I silenced my screams with your name

I hid my sadness behind the scenes,
So that you wouldn''t have to worry
So that you wouldn''t have to know
So that you wouldn''t have to care
About what it is I feel inside.

Now all these emotions surrounding you
Are forever lost
And you''ll never know why they existed
Within me, underneath me,
Don''t tell me what happened,
I''m still smiling through my pain.