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Getting On : Lovers
Fallacies in female logic that lead to the oft-heard assumption, “All the great guys are gay.” | from Joe H - Friday, December 13, 2002
accessed 2747 times I frequently hear women saying: “All the great guys are gay (or married)” I’ve spent some time thinking about it and have hit upon the fallacies in female logic that lead to these assumptions (in my opinion):
1. Every woman’s inherent belief that she is attractive and desirable, therefore any man who would reject her must be gay.
2. Gay men are “great.”
3. And the most easily refuted one: A well-dressed man must be gay, because straight men have notoriously poor fashion sense.
Let’s analyze these one by one, shall we? :
1. Any man who rejects me is gay. The stereotypical man, upon seeing an attractive woman, will say something along the lines of “How you doin’?”, try to look down her shirt, grab her ass, and engage in various male courting behaviors whose utter lack of subtlety is matched only by their (for the most part) ineffectuality. When a man does not behave this way around a woman, it does not mean that he is not attracted to her, simply that he is a gentleman. And if he is not attracted to her, why does that make him gay? Are we required to attempt to sleep with every female we see to maintain our masculinity?
2. Gay men are “great.” Gay men are still men. You can’t use stereotypes perpetuated by a few notable homosexuals like Rupert Everett and Will from “Will and Grace” to define a whole group of people whose only uniting factor is their sexual preference. A gay man is quite simply a man who is sexually attracted to other men, period. He is not necessarily a Broadway buff, gourmet food addict, or an interior decorator. There is also a widely held belief that gay men are sweet and sensitive, like a woman, which can be disputed from many angles. Just because someone understands you and identifies with you (and who says gay men do?), doesn’t mean you would want to spend the rest of your life with them. Do you want your boyfriend asking you “Does this make me look fat?”
3. All well-dressed men are gay.
This can be broken down into two parts:
Statement 1: Some gay men are well dressed, THEREFORE
Statement 2: All well dressed men are gay.
Any intelligent person can tell you that Statement 1 does not imply Statement 2. For the less intelligent (no offence at women intended here), Venn diagrams (you remember, those intersecting circles from 10th grade Algebra?) can be used.
The fact is that there are straight men (however rare), who have their act together, are charming, cultured, educated, well-dressed, and respectful of women. Just because you have not had the good fortune or the sufficient skill to attract one of them does not mean that they are ALL unavailable.
Do men sit around complaining that all the hot women are lesbians? No. If a woman rejects us, we make the more accurate assumption that we are simply lacking in charm, wealth, or good looks, or that she is married or has a boyfriend.
So please, when you meet an attractive man, don’t assume that he is gay because he doesn’t immediately try to hit on you. Maybe he's shy. Maybe he's not interested. Maybe he just didn't see you. And even if he is gay or married as the popular “young-bachelorette’s tale” goes, you still lose more by making assumptions than by giving someone the benefit of the doubt.
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Reader's comments on this article Add a new comment on this article |  from getting laid < ur not!
Wednesday, June 30, 2004 - 05:32
  (Agree/Disagree?)
You know, reading these entire column, I came to the conclusion: This guy Joe H, just needs to admit to himself, that he's gay! You might be better of ...... getting laid by men .... boy, you talk incessantly .... and it seems to me, you are even flattered that women think you are gay!
(reply to this comment)
|  From Joe H
Wednesday, June 30, 2004, 10:18
(Agree/Disagree?)
LOL, yes, you're right, I would get laid a lot more often if I were gay. This city is full of gay men, who hit on me constantly. Ironically, though, none of them are very well-dressed or good-looking, though most are pretty smooth-talking and have a good sense of humor.(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | From Joe H
Wednesday, June 30, 2004, 10:23
(Agree/Disagree?)
I guess you must have missed all the comments I made about fat chicks. I live in the fattest state west of the rockies, where sleeping with chubby girls is statistically unavoidable. Over time, this caused me to develop a preference for more slender-figured women (and to stop drinking so much), but I am still repulsed by starved, bony, model-types. I don't remember any comments I made expressing a preference for "extremely slim women," as you suggest. (reply to this comment) |
| | From nobody
Wednesday, June 30, 2004, 11:19
(Agree/Disagree?)
Jo’s life in Narnia
If anything you’re confirming the assumptions made. Gay-dar to other men is usually reserved to gay men. I’ve had straight friends who had no cue that their new friend fancied them. The only ones who noticed were closet cases.
Why don’t you move to a big city, no wonder you are so nasty sometimes life in the sticks must be pretty boring.
(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | From Joe H
Wednesday, June 30, 2004, 17:15
(Agree/Disagree?)
I'm reminded of what Homer Simpson once said about our neighbours to the north: "Americans are England's children. Sure we don't call home as often as our goody-two-shoes brother Canada, who by the way has never had a girlfriend...."
Funnily enough, it turns out Homer is a Canadian: "the show's creator, Matt Groening, noted Thursday his dad was born in Canada. Homer being named after Groening's father, so what does where does this lead Homer?
"That would make Homer Simpson a Canadian," Groening said in an interview. "I hope Canadians won't hold it against the show now that they know.
Not all too surprising, as one fan noted, "Homer eats foods commonly associated with Canada: donuts, beer, bacon, and has been know to have a glass of maple syrup for breakfast.".
http://ccr.ptbcanadian.com/simpsons/(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | From GoldenMic
Wednesday, June 30, 2004, 19:01
(Agree/Disagree?)
Dear Jules, I am actually enjoying the maple leaves all over the site. Mostly, this is because I remain somewhat computer-challenged, and I always appreciate seeing the new "bells and whistles" of a well-maintained site. Hey, how did the elections go? I confess, I am hoping the conservatives won. Also, I must admit to a feeling of proprietary (sp?) interest, like any chauvinist American (see how I appropriate the whole continent), and I actually do always wish the best for my northern neighbors. Mike M.(reply to this comment) |
| | From Jules
Wednesday, June 30, 2004, 20:18
(Agree/Disagree?)
Well the most appropriate outcome for your northern neighbours actually came about. We have a minority Liberal government. While Canada is certainly Liberal, we certainly despise arrogance, and a minority government sends that message to our own ruling party.
There is a quote (frequently misappropiated to Winston Churchill) that says "if you are under 30 and are not Liberal you have no heart, if you are over 30 and are not Conservative you have no brain."
I don't know if I agree with that. However it is interesting to see the Boomers who would have done anything to stop Vietnam resign themselves to seeing the less priveleged children of America go and die for Bush's/Cheney's war. We hear ad nauseam about the passion of the Boomers in the sixties (aka the golden age) and how they changed society. Where are they now? I suppose taking a stand would interfere with their 410k and/or their investments in Philip Morris.
(Mike, this is not to you, but to the Boomers who "lost their soul".) When did you stop caring about anything more than yourself? When did you become everything you said you would never be? When did you die inside and become old?
Is life truly worth living if you stop caring about it? (reply to this comment) |
| | | | | From Jules
Wednesday, June 30, 2004, 16:29
(Agree/Disagree?)
Joe, sweetie, you really should get a map and look at it. Quebec is a wonderful part of the diversity within Canada. Montreal is an absolutely fabulous city. Everytime I visit I am always struck by how beautiful the men (and women) are there. While I love Toronto, there is no better place in Canada to party.
No part of Quebec touches either sea. (reply to this comment) |
| | | | | From Nick
Wednesday, June 30, 2004, 14:37
(Agree/Disagree?)
Jules, are you also a brit? Or did you just live there a long time?
You know, I was looking over a huge pile of pic's the other day and came across one of You, some other girl I can't recognize and myself in Hyde park on that "Teen outreach week" they had all those years ago. I don't think I have seen that pic in 10 years. (reply to this comment) |
| | From Jules
Wednesday, June 30, 2004, 15:17
(Agree/Disagree?)
I have dual citizenship so I am also British. I missed England a lot when I first came to North America, but I guess it's a credit to integration into my society of residence that I find I identify more and more with Canada every year that I live here.
Please, please do not post that photograph, but could you scan it and email it to me? I have no pictures from that time as everything, including my personal photos were left behind when I left the group. It's weird having no physical record of an entire period in your life. While I didn't care about having to leave everything at the time, it's still part of who I was and I would very much like to have some documentation.
I remember that teen outreach week. You were just a kid (you must have been about 13 or so?) but were such a charmer and well mannered and the teenage girls all were in agreement that you would grow up to be a heartbreaker. (reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | | | | From Jules
Wednesday, June 30, 2004, 17:03
(Agree/Disagree?)
I suppose in the spirit of fairness, I should do something like this.
OK, going off topic but I have been thinking about a little rant on this for some time. Why can’t some people here differentiate between me being an admin and me being a participant?
If I do something that only an admin can do (block someone, add falling maple leaves, say if you post topless pictures it will get the server shut down, etc.) that would be me acting as an admin of this Web site. If I voice an opinion, that is me speaking as an EQUAL participant on this Web site.
Perhaps it’s my own fault and if it’s hard enough for me to know when to change hats, perhaps I should make it very clear when I am changing those roles. I don’t know.
One of the most disturbing things I ever experienced though was when someone I did not know well spoke to me over the phone and told me that it was strange for them to hear my voice. They said that they had thought of me as an entity (“Jules”) and not as a person. Coming from where we all are coming from, that upset me a great deal. While I have not perhaps been through the worst of what some have, I have experienced a lot. The triggers are right there for me on many issues and I struggle daily with many things that have been discussed here.
Okay, even more off topic, but I hope that I could be accepted here as a person and not an “entity”. I was no one in the cult so I don’t even know how to begin to deal with any of that. I do feel responsible on some level for this web site, and I can’t help that. This was the first site I ever built on my own and the issue of providing a forum for those of us who were raised in the group to speak their piece is something that is very very important to me. I am also figuring things out for myself, just as all of us are and there’s a lot that is still confusing and murky.
I feel sometimes that I am expected to be a schoolmarm or peace keeper (I guess that’s what I get for being Canadian) or bearer of truth. Honestly people, I am just winging it most of the time. There is no big book of how to run an web site for ex SGs, I have no clue if I am doing the right thing or not, but I just have to go with my gut. I understand that any role that can be seen as authoritative is triggering. It triggers me all the time to be perceived in that role. Sometimes someone has to say something and I hope I say the right thing.
Sorry Nick, (if you read all of this) I will post eagles or flags or something for July 4th. What about fireworks?(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | From GoldenMic
Wednesday, June 30, 2004, 19:13
(Agree/Disagree?)
Wow, Jules, I must admit that I admire you a lot for your willingness to take on two such antithetical roles, and it really got me thinking when you brought up the issue of having been a "nobody" in TF. How wierd it must be to deal with Power and Control issues here, where you have such status, when your Family experiences have taught you to de-value your own significance. Sometimes, I find myself wishing that you could somehow more fully absorb the enormity of love and respect that so many people here feel towrds you, even when they are griping. It seems to me that you deserve that much, at least, from this work; the chance to experience the joy and pain of true admiration and respect. I guess I am getting a bit maudlin, here, but sometimes the underlying damage of our pasts, the sheer weight of so much parental abuse and oppression, really gets to me. Oh well, then, back to work! Love, Mike M.(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | from Ruthie
Monday, May 03, 2004 - 10:03
(Agree/Disagree?)
Joe H., you have written an interesting article here but you have completely ignored one aspect of the situation. You say that you have “spent some time thinking about it and have hit upon the fallacies in female logic that lead to these assumptions.” However, these fallacies cannot be attributed solely to women, but also to men. Men themselves perpetrate these stereotypes of men all the time.
For instance, I had a friend in high school who was artsy and sensitive. You have no idea how many times MALES, not girls, approached me and asked whether he was gay. I found that extremely annoying. In my experience, men usually assume that another man is gay if he does not enjoy sports, is sensitive, “artsy,” and has fashion sense.
Also, the main perpetrator of such stereotypes, the media, is not even controlled by women. Many men think up commercials (ever watch ones about beer?) that perpetrate the stereotypes of straight men only being interested in boobs, cars, sports, and drinking. On the other side of the spectrum, gay men are depicted mostly like “Will” and “The Fab 5.” If you look at the creators/ producers of such shows, you would see that they are not just “fallacious women” but “fallacious men” as well. You should include both sexes in an article such as this.
(reply to this comment)
| From Ne Oublie
Monday, May 03, 2004, 11:37
(Agree/Disagree?)
Expounding on the aspect of media involvement in the perpetuation of these stereotypes. I have found very little evidence of these attitudes amongst my adult colleagues, whereas I see it in almost all teenagers I encounter. I think part of the problem is that so much of the media targets the teenage/young adult population. Thus the prevalent fashions and attitudes seen in the media are those of the school/college-going population - even in programmes which are supposedly about adults (such as Will & Grace, Friends, etc).
Throwing around comments about someone's sexuality is primarily a school-ground prank, and not one which is frequently used in the 'real world' of adults.
... or maybe I just work with accountants...(reply to this comment) |
| | From Joe H
Monday, May 03, 2004, 10:36
(Agree/Disagree?)
You're entirely correct, Ruthie, and I'm quite embarassed that I didn't even mention the role men play in promoting these stereotypes. I wrote this over a year ago, and while I don't think any of the points I was trying to make are invalid, I am surprised that I was so concerned about the issue. About six months ago, I stopped trying to be the most stylish guy in the room, and I stopped caring about whether or not people thought I was gay. Strangely enough, they stopped asking.
That being said, I appreciate everyone who posted thoughtful comments and/or advice on the actual issue, and didn't just stoop to pointing out my alleged unattractiveness and/or repressed homosexuality.(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | from nAuty
Monday, May 03, 2004 - 08:55
(Agree/Disagree?)
I find this article similar to the analogy that all strippers will sleep with you if you give them enough money. :-)
(reply to this comment)
| | | | | | | | | | from tudaisy
Sunday, May 02, 2004 - 20:11
(Agree/Disagree?)
Girls that say that ALL great guys are gay, don't know enough about gay guys, try having a gay boss, oh my god, you would never make that sort of a comment about them ever again.
And no, not all gay men dress well, or are educated. They might think the are because in thier eyes the world revolves around them. And to them all men are secretly gay and all men naturally want them. And no, they do not respect women or admire them cause if they did then they wouldn't be gay!
And the rest of the "good guys" are not the married ones, cause if they were, then they would stop hiting on me and trying to get in my pants, while there wifes are macking up with some other guy to make up for the fact that there husbands no longer find them attractive.
All this to say that you can not generalize on what one ignorant person might have said.
(reply to this comment)
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | from Wolf
Thursday, April 24, 2003 - 12:21
(Agree/Disagree?)
How to get laid quickly and often (for men):
1. Act like a jerk -- not a snobby jerk but a witty jerk.
2. Pay no attention to women. Act as if they might as well be floor mats.
3. You don't need anyone, especially not some hot-ass female trying to ooze out the charm.
4. Dress as if you couldn't care less -- but make it obvious that those pieces of junk on your feet are $200 designer shoes.
5. Avoid shaving too often, wearing excessive amounts of cologne or doing anything that may appear to be an attempt to attract the opposite sex.
It works every time, trust me.
(reply to this comment)
| from katrim4
Wednesday, April 23, 2003 - 13:45
(Agree/Disagree?)
Ok, so not all good looking, well dressed, educated men are gay. Anyone female that really thinks so has obviously not had much in the way of good experiences with men.
On another related subject though, what is up with guys that will immediately jump to the conclusion that "that guy must be gay" just because he happens to be good looking, talented, well dressed, etc? I think most women know what I mean. I have yet to have a conversation with a male (that was not gay) about the qualities of another male (good looking, talented, well dressed, etc) without the guy coming to the conclusion that the male in question must be gay. Is that what men do when they are envious? I know a lot of women that will admire another woman's body or behaviour and be able to compliment her on it without calling her a lesbian, dike or even a slut.
Women hear men complimenting other women on their looks all the time. Some, I'm sure, react worse than others. The general reaction though, is not usually a "gay" related comment. I can understand a signifant other being offended by a comment about someone elses good looks, but why stoop to "he must be gay"? If you ask me, men reinforce these "fallacies of logic" just as much as women do.
(reply to this comment)
| | | | from pharmaboy..
Wednesday, April 23, 2003 - 09:46
(Agree/Disagree?)
*me thinks someone needs to get laid more*
(reply to this comment)
| | | | from Mir
Wednesday, April 23, 2003 - 08:39
(Agree/Disagree?)
LOL! Joe, you crack me up! I think you've been hanging out with the wrong girls!
(reply to this comment)
| | | | from Heaven
Wednesday, April 23, 2003 - 04:44
(Agree/Disagree?)
I agree with everything you're saying. I'd just like to add something from a woman's point of view, or at least what I think is the view of most women. I have also spent some time thinking about these subjects.
1. Every woman has been led to believe that she is atractive, but not because she's beautiful. It's because they've been raised to believe that every man wants something to stick his dick into. This might be true, I'm not a man, but I'd like to believe it's not.
2. Gay men are great to women because they're not saying sexist, perverse things to them in every conversation the woman tries to have with them.
3. Most men think it's "manly" to not care about how they're dressed (quite rediculous) while they expect woman to look they're best at all hours of the day.
I was in a small high school where everybody knew everybody's business and rumors spread within a day. I was called a lesbian and a slut for not accepting every offer from a guy to fuck. The fact that this didn't bother me made me a lesbian that had slept with every guy in school. It didn't make much sense to me either.
I'm not sexist, men and women both are stupid (there are exceptions.) I believe they've been brainwashed to think they need to behave a certain way. If a little girl falls and scrapes her knee, everybody babys her and lets her cry. If a little boy falls and scrapes his knee, he's told to get back up and quit crying like a little baby. And so it goes on for the rest of their lives until the little boy is a man who thinks women are only there for sex and the little girl is now a women who wishes she could find a good gay guy who could understand her and not treat her like an object while she goes to buy the sexiest clothes she can find and puts on as much make-up as she can without looking like a clown.
I didn't have time to check spelling and grammer but I'm sure you can make sense of it.
(reply to this comment)
| From Joe H
Wednesday, April 23, 2003, 18:33
(Agree/Disagree?)
Your first 2 points are very broad generalizations, albeit with a shred of truth. I assume you know all men and women don't think like that so I won't get into that. I completely agree with #3 though. That's a "fallacy" of male logic that really bugs me. What could be less masculine than wanting to be as attractive to the opposite sex as possible? This hits on some other points I was planning to bring up in my upcoming "Pretty boy manifesto" But on the same topic, a lot of women leave the house looking like crap. What's with the hooded sweatshirts and baggy jeans? Maybe that's just Northwest casual and the rest of the country cares a lot more. Looks are important, maybe they shouldn't be, but they are. (reply to this comment) |
| | from sarafina
Tuesday, December 17, 2002 - 16:24
(Agree/Disagree?)
Although I do not think your qualified to be speaking on the topic of "female logic" I will agree that it is an interesting analogy.
I do admit there are certain characteristics the general population of gay men seem to have in common
which you bring out. One being they do almost all have great style but I have also dated many straight men who have also . They are also generally very
neat and tidy but again so are some straight men and it goes on and on. So you point that ....
" The fact is that there are straight men (however rare), who have their act together, are charming,cultured, educated, well-dressed, and respectful of women "
this is a very valid point.
So is this.."Just because you have not had the good fortune or the sufficient skill to attract one of them does
not mean that they are all unavailable."
In my opinion usually a man of such characteristics is also looking for a
woman who has more then just her beauty to offer and may turn down beautiful looking women who have no substance and can't get through a sentance without using the words ..."me,I,and want" in it. Thus again leading them to believe that this man must be "gay" also.
I also think that by you posting this women my be led to assume that you are implying that you are one such guy.lol
and based on allot of your post and comments in here recently they may disagree. lol (hey I have to give you
some grief)
(reply to this comment)
| from Tankard
Monday, December 16, 2002 - 17:50
(Agree/Disagree?)
"Female logic" ?!!!!
Man, you really are intoxicated ;-)
(reply to this comment)
| | | | from cm
Sunday, December 15, 2002 - 14:36
(Agree/Disagree?)
Joe,
Serious question....Do you really have a difficult time getting laid?
I do not have much time but since you are looking for someone to attack your argument.....
How can you write an article that presupposes a unified "female logic" yet spend half the article dismissing the "myth" of a homosexual or gay logic?
Wish I had more time to get psuedo-intellectual, maybe more later...........
(reply to this comment)
| | | | From cm
Monday, December 16, 2002, 04:21
(Agree/Disagree?)
DISCLAIMER: I am intoxicated... .
I gathered that you were having a hard time geting laid not from this article but from your aggregate posts/comments.
An article titled "fallacies in female logic" implies a unified female logic.
1) I believe that your first point is very mislead. I believe that women generally feel ugly most of the time.
You know how you feel when you are wearing a Prada suit and Gucci shoes to a party? Generally you are twice as self-depreciating as you would be if you were wearing jeans and a baseball cap. You wonder if you have lint on your jacket and if you are wearing too much cologne. You know that you tried your best to impress but you should have done more. Imagine being a hot woman who knows everyone in the room is looking at her. She wonders if her lipstick is too red, she secretly despises the woman across the room carrying the J.P. Tod handbag, thinks about the time someone told her she had fat ankles, are her eyebrows waxed properly? She constantly needs (and she can see it in the "gaze of the other")reassurance that she is beautiful. It is a hightened awarness of the aesthetic. While you sit in the corner and are intimidated by her, she is begging for someone to validate her and tell her that her Tahari jacket goes well with her Siegerson-Morrison heels or just tell her that she is stunning. At least the guy that just walked by and stared at her boobs tells her that her $6,000 grand was well spent (I am sorry, I do live in Dallas). Your "subtlety" is probably actually mistaken for "ineffectuallity" , otherwise why do you not have the confidence to tell her you appreciate her efforts? There are ways to do this and still retain your status as a gentleman.
2) Being "gay" is not about being homosexual but about participating in a culture, the same way that being black does not neccesitate participation in a hip-hop culture. Nevertheless, most homosexuals participate in "gay" culture. Gay men tell her that she is fabulous and they understand a vocaulary that 99% of the straight men find "vain" and expensive (Myself being part of the remaining 1%) . They are as intrigued by the play of images as she is and do not pose a threat, therefore they are pretty great. Nevertheless, while she wants to be appreciated, she probably does not want you to take her cultural superiority away from her by being more fashionable then her. Her id is searching for a father, not a style consultant.
3) I was going to take the time to criticize your compound sentence structure but it is beside the point.
They do not really think that you are gay, they are just looking for you to show them you are interested so that they can have the pleasure of rejecting/accepting your advance. Maybe they do not want to have to make "a little effort" for you to show them you are attracted.
Take some risks. If you are lucky enough for them to be asking you if you are in fact gay, you are on the right track already. It is a complement.(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | from thepersoniamnow
Sunday, December 15, 2002 - 13:33
(Agree/Disagree?)
One girl told me that the reason she liked gay guys was that with them she had a much better chance of having a real friendship.
I know that my initial thoughts about a girl is whether shes cute or not.
Now although I do have alot of female friends, I can`t honestly say that I was never either attracted to them or that my default mindset has never affected our friendship.
So basically if a guy is gay, he won`t be chasing her.
This concept is also true the other way around although not nearly as common.
I haven`t heard the one about "well dressed =gay" so often.
I`m not usually called gay because half of my wardrobe are jerseys and singlets, so I am effectively, straight and very badly dressed.
If its becoming common for girls who call guys that aren`t interested in them "gay" then thats pretty weird, but I haven`t seen it personally.
It would be nice to assume that all the hotties that don`t wanna talk to me are lesbian though ;)
(reply to this comment)
| from Jerseygirl
Sunday, December 15, 2002 - 12:08
(Agree/Disagree?)
I think we're all going to wake up one day and realise that Joe was indeed God's gift to women and kick ourselves for passing him by and not giving him a chance to "let him make happy women" of us.
(reply to this comment)
| from Mercy
Sunday, December 15, 2002 - 03:06
(Agree/Disagree?)
This reminds me of one Alanis Morissette's songs. She obviously wrote this one in tribute of men (she's not always bashing them).
"A Man"
I am a man as a man I've been told
Bacon is brought to the house in this mold
Born of your bellies I yearn for the cord
Years I have groveled repentance ignored
And I have been blamed
And I have repented
I'm working my way toward our union mended
I am man who has grown from a son
Been crucified by enraged women
I am a son who was raised by such men
I'm often reminded of the fools I'm among
And I have been shamed
And I have relented
I'm working my way toward our union mended
And I have been shamed
And I have repented
I'm working my way toward our union mended
we don't fare well with endless reprimands
we don't do well with a life served as a sentence
this won't work well if you're hell bent on your offence
I am a man who understands your resistance
I am a man who still does what he can
to dispel our archaic reputation
I am a man who has heard all he can
cuz I don't fare well with endless punishment
Cuz I have been blamed and I have repented
I'm working my way toward our union mended
And we have been blamed and we have repented
I'm working my way toward our union mended
I do not think highly of Joe since he feels the need to insult my intelligence and praise my physical attributes every chance he gets. However I do feel that he has a vaguely good point. We do have a bad habit of saying that all the great guys are gay. It does seem that way sometimes, but what kind of a generalistic statement is that? A whole lot of gay men are catty assholes, and a lot of straight men have a very good fashion sense. And on a related subject I do think that 20 to 40 year old straight, middle class, white males get a very bad rap. They are the global punching bag. Everyone has a problem with them. And in all honesty, they aren't THAT bad.
(reply to this comment)
| | | | from Jules
Saturday, December 14, 2002 - 18:28
(Agree/Disagree?)
"All the great guys are gay (or married)"
Joe is straight and single.
Seems to me to prove the point.
(reply to this comment)
| | | | from venus_fly_trap
Saturday, December 14, 2002 - 18:20
(Agree/Disagree?)
sure joe, did you have a bad friday night out at the bar scene? i don't think the reason all those women walked by you was because you looked so groomed that they thought you were gay. from my experience many of the most beautiful women are in fact not interested in men much any more. we don't like to "be made happy for a night or two" by the gentleman who stands in the corner. many lovelies have found much better nights amongst themselves and that's why they turned you down or walked by you. aim a little lower next time and you might score, dude...
(reply to this comment)
| | | | | | | | | | From MGP
Sunday, December 15, 2002, 13:46
(Agree/Disagree?)
Thats right, women are scatter-brains who dont know what they want. One day they want someone who is sensitive, next day they want a muscle bound hero, and the list goes on.
The day I discovered this, was the day I stopped wearing nice clothes, grew a beard, skipped the occasional shower and generally decided to be what I wanted to be.
This will eventually demonstrate that life is indeed a circle, & I expect to start attracting women any time soon now with my philosophy.
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | From --
Sunday, December 15, 2002, 17:10
(Agree/Disagree?)
I don't want to speak for all women, but from what I gather women are learning at a faster pace of what they do Not want than what they do want.
So far, I come up with a short list of what (some) women want.
1) They want to be treated with respect. As a measure, the same respect you give yourself.
2) They want to feel a connection with somebody w/o it always being about sex.
3) They want to be able to be vulneralble w/o having to worry about the other half abusing that vulnerablity.
4) They want to have fun, which ever way each person does.(reply to this comment) |
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