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Getting On : This Site Sucks
sorry | from therli - Saturday, March 15, 2008
accessed 2287 times decadence I've been on this site a year or two ago and I'm sorry to say but the conversations where much more interesting than they are now. I guess things have died down a bit because this site has become like some forum for "nothing special". where you just talk about all and nothing. it's sad but true. i know many of you will be mad at me for saying that, but that's what i think. |
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Reader's comments on this article Add a new comment on this article |  from double
Saturday, March 22, 2008 - 10:29
(Agree/Disagree?)
Yeah. Prolly cuz the old folks who had juicy things to say are all in uni or, you know, doing shit n'stuff. While all who are left on the site are young'ns or -as has to be said - people who have nothing else to do.
I have nothing else to do.
(reply to this comment)
| | | | | | | | | | from Feed
Thursday, March 20, 2008 - 12:34
(Agree/Disagree?)
Question regarding therli’s articles:
It was obvious right from the beginning that this whole thing was a staged so, why is everyone playing along? Are people capable of discerning genuine or does everyone just plays along nowadays?
(reply to this comment)
| | | | | | | from neez
Tuesday, March 18, 2008 - 22:51
(Agree/Disagree?)
I also think this site used to have a lot more interesting conversation, and lot of the more vocal members don't post here much anymore.
I put this down to certain events that attracted a lot of media and public attention. Not to mention all the bible-dragging idiots that stumble in here now after reading this sites name in a recent book(no offence to the authors, but I would have left the name out of it).
But you say you've been here for a couple years, yet you've only posted two articles(you don't have to post a new article for every paragraph btw), and a handful of comments. Do you not see the irony of complaining about the lack of interesting content by participants?
In your first post you talk about 'us' being all talk and no action, and you have a few ideas of what we could do and how "entertaining" it would be. Yet I get the feeling you haven't tried any of them yourself, am I right?
(reply to this comment)
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | |  From Jailbird
Wednesday, March 19, 2008, 11:52
  (Agree/Disagree?)
If you've helped support people on their way out good for you. I've done so myself and while I try not to validate myself in terms of that type of activity anymore, if I've helped someone not mis-use more of their life through staying in the cult, that's very positive.
I would encourage you not to try to address or engage people on this site once a pack mentality has developed and come out in full force, as it seems to have on this post. If you persist with dissent some assclown will invent a new term or condition you've violated, and ban you. Or if you disagree with someone, have a heated exchange etc, you'll be accuseed of harrassment and God knows what else.
It's not worth you time. A man of science once told me that on this site, and I mistakenly thought I should be able to speak my piece, but he was right. He never visits or comments anymore.
(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | From GoldenMic
Wednesday, March 19, 2008, 14:34
(Agree/Disagree?)
While I understand the sentiment behind suggesting, "try to avoid heated rhetoric once a pack mentality has begun to form", this seems a bit over-stated. I have periodically elicited a near-unanimous rejection of my own thoughts and comments here, and when I have re-read the post and analyzed my words, I typically find that it was not the point I had made, but my appearance of condescention, judgement, a "you people" statement, or a "my way is the only way" attitude on my own part. I truly do not believe that most of the participants on this site are unwilling to tolerate alternative views, (except for those views that appear to minimize/justify TF's culpability, disrespect a member's legitimate pain, or actively attack and deride the entire group here). It really isn't any of my business, therli, but I do not actually believe it is the reactions of a capricious Moving On admin. you need to worry about, or even the lack of majority support for your opinions, but if your views are important to you and you believe they might be worth consideration, it could be helpful to present those views in ways that more clearly demonstrate respect for the listener and your own willingness to engage in a healthy critical self-examination of your own rightness. Again, its not my business and I aplogize if I have over-stepped myself in commenting, but if you value this forum as much as I do and would like to enhance the experience, I thought these few words might be of interest to you. (reply to this comment) |
| | | | | From jezz
Wednesday, March 19, 2008, 21:11
(Agree/Disagree?)
What's so wrong with the "my way is the only way" attitude? If it's how one feels at the time. Must every point one is trying to make be sugar coated? Frankly, I find it kind of annoying the way some people on this site are overly tactful. For example: "Again, its not my business and I apologize if I have over-stepped myself in commenting". Why do you feel the need to apologize? I get that you are being diplomatic and it's definitely a good quality but ( and I'm not just referring to your comment) Sometimes it's nice to just hear what someone thinks without all the B.S.
(reply to this comment) |
| | From GoldenMic
Thursday, March 20, 2008, 11:40
(Agree/Disagree?)
Good point Jezz, but as noted below, I am a guest here and so I try to express my appreciation and respect. As a fellow cult survivor, I know how it feels when an outsider presumes they have a right to sling out any old thought or opinion. But you are also right about the sheer joy of just saying what you mean, and I do have a site (much smaller) where my own tiny ex-cultie group talks, and where I periodically go crazy, get a bit judgemental, and periodically tell my friends to fuck off. Sometimes, as you say, its good to just say the thing. MikeM.(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | From vix
Thursday, March 20, 2008, 04:57
(Agree/Disagree?)
It depends on what issue is being discussed, I think. Of course there are some things I feel so strongly about that I find it difficult to accept that others can't or won't agree with me. But most of the time I think it's fair to say that I see my opinion as right *for me* and not necessarily for everyone else. I don't care that people think differently to me (unless it impacts directly on myself, my children or my life) but they sure as hell better not try to dictate to me or I'll definitely react fiercely. If my ego ends up so closely tied up with my opinions that I become overly emotional and less rational (and I know this happens fairly regularly), I generally admit that fact once I've had time to mull things over.
(reply to this comment) |
| | From vix
Wednesday, March 19, 2008, 16:07
(Agree/Disagree?)
Good to see you around again, GoldenMic, and as usual you offer sound advice.
Therli, I called you an idiot earlier and I apologise for that. It was unnecessarily abrasive. I assure you that when you begin to write more specifically about things that you care about or feel (instead of lecturing and dictating, as if your opinion is somehow paramount), and if your writings move me emotionally or challenge my intellect or cause me to re-examine my own perspectives, I will gladly offer you the measure of my respect that you will have earnt.
Until then, welcome back to the site. Whatever it is you hope to gain from coming here, I hope you are able to find it.
(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | From GoldenMic
Wednesday, March 19, 2008, 17:23
(Agree/Disagree?)
Thanks, Vixen. I am actually on this site several times a day, though I have not posted much lately. I was wondering about that statement "you people who have too much time on your hands if you are here all the time". In all honesty, I don't have a lot of time on my hands, living with an overly-full professional and personal schedule, and yet I still come aboard 3-4 times a day. This site is an important part of my day, and I am constantly fascinated, encouraged, and inspired by the lives and words of so many fellow survivors. Also, I am WAY biased in favor of the Moving On adm. a perspective I admit is based soley on my unmitigated affection for the site's creator!(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | From Jailbird
Wednesday, March 19, 2008, 12:01
(Agree/Disagree?)
I don't think a single person can be "wholly" responsible. So I see what neez is saying. But to your point you can certainly act as one of the critical catalysts for the change.
It's obvious you're feeling attacked, I know the feeling. Don't allow yourself to react to your emotions in this forum, believe me, it doesn't work. There's no audience, and very few of these people have any concern whatsoever for you as a person. Sadly I think it's an extension of how we were raised, and a large percentage of people have internalized those behavioral patterns or are at least acting out to them at a sub-concious level. Don't look for acceptance or support in this general forum, it doesn't exist in my experience. This used to be a much cooler forum back in the days. I don't know what to say.
(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | From conan
Wednesday, March 19, 2008, 11:33
(Agree/Disagree?)
Actually, giving a statement based on proof you believe yourself to be in possession of is hardly "logic", but more often a likely hypothesis, or occasionally, assumption which as we all know, makes an ass of U and mption. Also, what's this "proof" you are aware of, or that you have? Do you have access to IP addresses and electronic timestamps attached to individual posts and comments on this site? If so, I'd have to assume you were an editor or administrator on this site and as such your open condemnation of the participants would be a large usurpation of your limited powers on this site.
If however, you do not have the correct access codes conveyed to you via the proper sources (this site's administrator), either you are a hacker with way too much time on their hands and way too concerned about how the participants of this cyber space use this forum, or you're talking out of your ass, and way too concerned about how the participants of this cyber space use this forum.(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | From therli
Wednesday, March 19, 2008, 11:55
(Agree/Disagree?)
If one believes it be "proof" he handles, one does not divulge a hypothesis or assumption when connecting this “proof” to another element using deduction. Furthermore finding the knowledge of the “proof” does not demand being a hacker. All it requires is your presence on this site. I have explained how I came across this inconceivable awareness and if you don’t understand it, I guess no one can help you. (reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | From A helpful Link for You?
Wednesday, March 19, 2008, 15:48
(Agree/Disagree?)
1.Persecution Complex:
One of the top fifteen factors that can transform a reasonable, amiable, friendly person with reasonable, friendly beliefs and ideas into a ranting, screaming, judgemental zealot with poisonous, nauseating, self-righteous dreck for beliefs.
Persecution complex can strike anyone, regardless of belief, creed or religion, or whether they disagree with you or not. Once you start believing that the whole world is against you, you begin to justify your abominable actions by the presumed hostility of the world. Mind you, it's a great way to not only make enemies, but also an excellent way of making people reject your beliefs and idealogy.
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=persecution+complex(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | From rainy
Tuesday, March 25, 2008, 13:29
(Agree/Disagree?)
In that case you're doing very well. At first I thought you might be Seanswede, although he uses a lot of K's in place of C's. I haven't seen you do that. Then I thought you might be Thatata, but he was always pleasant to everyone, so I've dismissed that notion. Your style of English is similar to his, however. Which country are you from? (Just curious)(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | From I Agree
Thursday, March 20, 2008, 11:36
(Agree/Disagree?)
The test of any system is how it reacts to dissenting or unpopular views. Again you speak for "many of us," I speak for myself.
"But that decision was taken at the request of more than just a few people."
If 10 racists decide to lynch a black man, or 10 Natzis decide to abuse a jew, numbers say nothing to the validity of the decision.
I feel harassed by your comment. The person you called an idiot may feel you're harassing them. Are you running a "campaing of harassment," because of my feeling or that opinion. Perhaps, perhaps not.
At the end of the day what it comes down to is that people are allowed to do what they want with the things they control, and apparently dissent about said decisions are taken very personally.
I like probing the boundaries of any human system, its where one learns about onself and others.
I also think there's a difference between accepting that people aren't going to agree with ones position and being willing to be called an, "idiot","insane", told to "fuck off" etc. ... which some people feel entitled to state about others, but claim harrassment and sufferenting when such statements are directed at themselves or members of their pose.
(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | From vix
Thursday, March 20, 2008, 15:05
(Agree/Disagree?)
I'm not sure you were referring specifically to me in the above commennt, but I'll answer it as if you were since my regular presence here most likely means that some things do apply to me.
Harrassment is different than once in a while becoming hot under the collar and being harsher than one should have been. Yes I've been horribly mean to a few people on this forum, but I hope I've sincerely apologised to each of them if not in public then certainly one on one, and I hope that they understood that my bile was not actually due to any real problem with them but was much more about me and my own issues at that time.
I think I have been willing to admit that I got out of hand and have tried to make amends. And I don't think I've ever posted comment after comment after comment of thoroughly unpleasant discourse for days on end and carried that assault into real life where it might have had all sorts of negative repercussions on others. I hope that my presence on this forum has had more positives to it than negatives.
For the record, I disagreed with the way many people jumped on and attacked the individual involved in the given situation when he was posting about things that obviously meant a great deal to him (before the whole storm started). I didn't say it publically in the different threads because I wanted to stay out of it completely, but I do remember stating on several occasions to any number of people (my 'posse' included, if by that you meant those who I would consider close friends) that I did not agree with the way that person was mocked and derided during what was obviously a difficult time for him.
Finally, I don't think I've ever claimed harrassment when people have had a go at me. I've had my feelings hurt and been offended, sure, and fought my corner fiercely as is my right, but I've never tried to have someone shut up or banned for something that they've said to me or about me.
If you weren't talking at least in part about me, I'm sure you'll disregard this comment.
(reply to this comment) |
| | From Fish
Friday, March 21, 2008, 09:46
(Agree/Disagree?)
What the devil are you talking about? This is starting to get annoying. Who was this "harasser" and when did his "reign of terror" take place? I'm deeply saddened that I missed it, whatever "it" was. Doubtless my snide contributions were sorely missed.
(Sings) "But if you've missed it somehow and don't know who to turn to now, don't give up, lift an ear to the heavens...." Amen? Next time I fully intend to seize the golden opportunity of that table rag and wipe the table with it. Do you?(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | From I Disagree
Saturday, March 22, 2008, 21:48
(Agree/Disagree?)
Luckily most people on this sight hold a certain amount of respect to it: we left the cult because we were abused, neglected as children, taken advantage of mostly due to our naivety. ( I should add that some people have no clue as to what they are talking about and/or Only have their won agenda.) About the abuse on this sight: it’s a pretty gray area, but, personally I hold a fair amount of resentment. When personal information given to individuals (whom I thought could be trusted) via email or the chartroom is divulged on another sight it kind of pisses me off. Especially, when it is done so subtlety-- such information as personal tragic events that have happen while in or since I left the cult, personal information--fears, relationships that didn’t work out etc) that were divulged in such a manner that made it hard for me or anyone to prove such abuse-- knowing I would be scared, yet unable to prove anything.
It’s a perfect example of went on in the cult and, why these mother fuckers get away with what they do. I am no saint and sometimes when I have taken all I can bare I sometimes tend to want revenge and usually end up giving myself away. I am not saying I am not guilty; simply I don’t like being taken advantage or when people I love are taken advantage of. I’ve posted/given a lot of personal information including information about my family to certain individual in this sight who took advance of it somewhere else. Sure, one could say “I asked for it” yet isn’t that the typical response of the abuser? In a way I did ask for it only by being so naive....yet, at the same time it seems perfectly natural for me to want a certain amount of revenge for the individual who betrayed my trust.
Again, it’s rather a gray area and I am not saying I am planning on playing the victim here. I was mistreated and mistreated others yet, there are certain things that still irk me especially when I am not sure who is fucking with me (partially, when I’m paranoid that it might be someone in the cult, as in the recent past while still in denial, I was far too honest with my parents, etc) because of my tendency to disclose far too much information about myself and others. This all has left me fairly disillusioned about the world in general. And I am sorry for any unnecessary pain/drama I have caused people I care about due to my own agenda.
I’d rather be the first to straight out say something someone has been insinuating all along then be fucked with in the head over and over. I’m Not saying I am not capable or have been guilty of being subtle myself, in fact all this has taught me how to do so, sometimes it can be rather fun especially when done in jest, yet often, people/myself don’t see the ripple effect it can cause others especially when it is viewed with blinders and/or doesn’t consider the countless number of (decent) present and past individuals who are also or have been involved and inversely involved in my/their lives. I am readily willing to let the whole “high school drama” thing go as I see it is all pretty ridiculous and I shouldn’t let such travail words bother me but, it has. Thus, I was compelled to say so. Also, because it is something I find fairy fun and because of my addictive personality, I find I can get so involved as to ignore other important, pressing matters in my everyday life not to mention it was/is eating away at my health. All that to say, I don’t appreciate being fucked with (I had enough of that in the cult) and if someone wants to fuck with me I am often more then willing to give them a taste of their own medicine—sometimes stuff that was written in the cult or events in my life make a perfect analogy and I tend to act it out or try to portray it in that way—often failing. Again, it kills me when the perfect example/parallel is something I hold dear. Just thought I’d put in my 2 cents though I’m not sure this makes much sense being that I just had fair at the moment of wine. The Bottom line is I’d still like to be honest and straight forward with people but, I see that that isn’t how the world operates. (reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | from DeeJay
Monday, March 17, 2008 - 22:00
(Agree/Disagree?)
Therli, you know it's weird. I'm starting to pick up alot of contradictions, I don't know if it's just in your comments, or maybe a reflection of the confusion inside yourself.
#1 You speak about how people are not moving on, yet you're reminiscing about past conversations and ariticles and how things were so much more interesting in the past. You're also the only one I seem to see quoting like "as dad would say" - talk about living in the past/not being over the cult.
#2 You seem to have no problem dishing out the criticism, but can't seem to handle having it dished back at you. You dismiss others articles as boring, and then call us boring for commenting on yours. You say that some of us think others are totally insane for not agreeing with us while using a far more condescending tone to dismiss our opinions. Please tell me I'm wrong, but I feel as if I also being dismissed purely on the basis of having an opinion contrary to yours?
#3 You accuse me (I was gonna say 'us' instead of 'me' so I wouldn't look totally self-centered but decided to scratch that. Since I've been fairly active on the site recently, I'm gonna take it that the accusation was addressed to me.) of spending way too much time on this site to have a productive life. Is something wrong with my eyes or have you been in alot more conversations than I have in the last few days?
#4 I have offered to you a few genuine questions, none of which you try to reply to except for a blind accusation of close-mindedness which you didn't even bother to explain. I have said things which were false, and have retracted or apologized for them later, but where in that statement was the "proof of my closemindedness"? CAn I assume that you lashing out at me is simply a cover for your own lack of sound logic? Perhaps you just not really thought it through before it spilled over onto the keyboard? Or you really do have great answers which you just want to keep from me because I'm too ignorant to know the truth.
#5 Your "better than you" attitude which I think is pretty apparent in most of your comments is really starting to bug me. I have asked you to debate the point of your life being more productive than mine, and you also declined to comment. If you're going to say it, please back it up! Lay down a list of why your life is better than mine and your logic is superior to mine. Give me one example of why you are more open-minded than I am.....if you can. If not, please keep your ramblings to ramblings about yourself and not me/others.
(reply to this comment)
| From therli
Wednesday, March 19, 2008, 15:53
(Agree/Disagree?)
"""#1 You speak about how people are not moving on, yet you're reminiscing about past conversations and ariticles and how things were so much more interesting in the past. You're also the only one I seem to see quoting like "as dad would say" - talk about living in the past/not being over the cult. """"
There is a slight difference between looking back on previous articles and looking back on your life. Should I assume this site is your life? (I’m joking)
The “as dad would say” is a joke as well but I’m sure you understood it. Why do you dampen your intelligence so?
""""#2 You seem to have no problem dishing out the criticism, but can't seem to handle having it dished back at you. You dismiss others articles as boring, and then call us boring for commenting on yours. You say that some of us think others are totally insane for not agreeing with us while using a far more condescending tone to dismiss our opinions. Please tell me I'm wrong, but I feel as if I also being dismissed purely on the basis of having an opinion contrary to yours? """
I wasn’t aiming anyone in particular or personally, something that isn’t reciprocal. Have I ever called you boring for commenting on my articles????. Well I obviously have a different opinion then most of you on this site. In that doing, before I could ever act condescending, most of you were grabbing for my neck and trying to twist it. I had no choice but to reply in the same manner. And your feeling of being dismissed is normally called “being confronted to an argument”.
"""#3 You accuse me (I was gonna say 'us' instead of 'me' so I wouldn't look totally self-centered but decided to scratch that. Since I've been fairly active on the site recently, I'm gonna take it that the accusation was addressed to me.) of spending way too much time on this site to have a productive life. Is something wrong with my eyes or have you been in alot more conversations than I have in the last few days? """
If this accusation doesn’t apply to you, do not feel threatened. Considering the time spent on this site, allow me to explain: my fellow engineers and I have finished our project in record time. This has allowed me to have 3 days of pure free-time. I gave thought to what I wanted to do with this wonderful time and found nothing better than to go on this site.
"""#4 I have offered to you a few genuine questions, none of which you try to reply to except for a blind accusation of close-mindedness which you didn't even bother to explain. I have said things which were false, and have retracted or apologized for them later, but where in that statement was the "proof of my closemindedness"? CAn I assume that you lashing out at me is simply a cover for your own lack of sound logic? Perhaps you just not really thought it through before it spilled over onto the keyboard? Or you really do have great answers which you just want to keep from me because I'm too ignorant to know the truth."""
I can’t really answer this because I don’t know what comment you were referring to. But I’m sure I had some reason to accuse you of that infamy. But I do sometimes lack in patience answering the numerous “hate comments”. If I have spoken too fast please forgive me.
"""#5 Your "better than you" attitude which I think is pretty apparent in most of your comments is really starting to bug me. I have asked you to debate the point of your life being more productive than mine, and you also declined to comment. If you're going to say it, please back it up! Lay down a list of why your life is better than mine and your logic is superior to mine. Give me one example of why you are more open-minded than I am.....if you can. If not, please keep your ramblings to ramblings about yourself and not me/others."""
Once again it’s difficult to answer because I don’t feel better then you, neither do I think I have ever written anything leading to think something that preposterous seeing as I don’t know you.
(reply to this comment) |
| | From DeeJay
Wednesday, March 19, 2008, 22:03
(Agree/Disagree?)
Therli, I realize that having a difference of opinion is normal. I’ve also come to realize that you have a point of view which you refuse to budge on, that’s fine. But when confronted with facts, please show the same open-mindedness that you ask from me.
#1 There is a slight difference between looking back on previous articles and looking back on your life. Should I assume this site is your life? (I’m joking)
The “as dad would say” is a joke as well but I’m sure you understood it. Why do you dampen your intelligence so?
(Thread)
>>I don’t really get it. Maybe some of you could help me understand. I have moved on since a long time, as in i don’t think much about the family anymore. But obviously some of you just can’t get over it, or at least love talking about it.
(My point)
If I’m correct, this refers to us not getting over the family or our past life. You showed enough maturity to concede everyone is in a different phase of moving on. So why do you insist on attacking those who are not in the same stage as yourself?
#2 I wasn’t aiming anyone in particular or personally, something that isn’t reciprocal. Have I ever called you boring for commenting on my articles????. Well I obviously have a different opinion then most of you on this site. In that doing, before I could ever act condescending, most of you were grabbing for my neck and trying to twist it. I had no choice but to reply in the same manner. And your feeling of being dismissed is normally called “being confronted to an argument”.
(Thread A)
>>For example, if you really are into the cause and have lots of time to waste (which you do if you are a regular to this site) you could always rejoin the family and while in there, try to get some people out.
(Me)
Am I wrong or did you just say that if you are a regular on this site, then you have a lot of time to waste? From the number of comments I’ve posted in the last 2 weeks, I’d say I was a regular, so yes this is aimed at me.
(Thread B)
>>The most boring two articles I've seen on here all year are the last two.
>>yeah right. should i assume you like commenting on horribly boring articles, or that you comment on all articles, boring or interesting. in that case, you are a time waster
(Me) Is this not attacking(sorry, not boring, you said “a time waster) someone for commenting on your post? I’d also say that was pretty well aimed.
(Thread C)
>>Apparently we all have so much time to waste now, huh? WTF is up with that? BTW, loving to talk about it consistutes not having "moved on" how?
You should be ashamed of yourself. A wife, two kids and somehow you're still wasting time posting here. Remember - idleness is the devil's workshop.
>>it's entertaining to read the proof of your close mindedness.
(Me)This again seemed pretty well aimed. I again pose the question, where in the above comment is the proof of my closed mindedness? If you are seriously confronting me to an argument, then please argue the points I bring up rather than diverting to this “most of you this…and most of you that”. I too am an individual with my own set of opinions, which are up for debate, but not attacks which lack basis or foundation (and saying that one doesn’t divulge his proof doesn’t count). If you have them, step up to the plate, not resort to one-liners and try to come off witty.
#3 If this accusation doesn’t apply to you, do not feel threatened. Considering the time spent on this site, allow me to explain: my fellow engineers and I have finished our project in record time. This has allowed me to have 3 days of pure free-time. I gave thought to what I wanted to do with this wonderful time and found nothing better than to go on this site.
(Thread)
>>well explained, thank you. however some regulars are so present on this site, it's almost impossible that they have fulfilling and responsible lives.
(Me) Who then is this aimed at? I’d say been among the most present recently. If this really isn’t aimed at me, please me more specific and give a list of names so as to avoid this confusion.
P.S. No-one seems to take the comments I direct at you as directed at them, maybe you could take some of your own advice and use 5 or 6 more seconds to think about what the words you are writing mean before hitting the submit button.
I had a 15 minute smoke break and decided to see if you’d reply today. But this is pointless. Who cares how you managed to find time to be here today. What you say when here is the real issue.
#4 I can’t really answer this because I don’t know what comment you were referring to. But I’m sure I had some reason to accuse you of that infamy. But I do sometimes lack in patience answering the numerous “hate comments”. If I have spoken too fast please forgive me.
(Me) This is a bit of a cop out. You had “reason” to accuse me? Again, if you’re going to make the accusation, please be prepared to back it up. Off the top of my head, #3, Thread C is a pretty good example.
A piece of advice, why bother with the “hate comments”? Stick to the points being raised and who cares if some people say stupid things?
#5 Once again it’s difficult to answer because I don’t feel better then you, neither do I think I have ever written anything leading to think something that preposterous seeing as I don’t know you.
(Me) Perhaps it’s not just what you say, but the way in which you present it.
Your notion that anyone who hasn’t “forgotten” the way that you have hasn’t gotten over the cult, is more than a tad condescending. Your notion that some people (again, who?) are polluting the site and turning it into “some unoriginal stupid forum” is also put very condescendingly. The notion that we should “do something better with our time” because some of us are “so present on this site that it’s almost impossible for us to lead fulfilling lives” is quite clearly condescending. I could go on, but I’ll get back to my point.
Debate is one thing, but presented in the emotionally charged, honestly very degrading manner in which you do, you’re bound to get a lot of flak/hate comments from individuals such as myself who feel attacked by your generalizations and what have really come off as declarations that our lives would be so much better/more productive if we would all just be like you.
I respect your difference in opinions, but you could surely stand to work on your presentation so as to get to the point of what you are saying and not demean others unintentionally in the process.
(reply to this comment) |
| | From therli
Thursday, March 20, 2008, 14:29
(Agree/Disagree?)
(My point)
If I’m correct, this refers to us not getting over the family or our past life. You showed enough maturity to concede everyone is in a different phase of moving on. So why do you insist on attacking those who are not in the same stage as yourself?
-As I said in previous comments, I don’t think anyone (I know or heard of) have fully moved on. In my article, I phrased my thoughts wrong. What I pictured was some loser specimen living on this site, bitter like a lime, spending his or her days bad mouthing others, bored of the main subject, changing it slowly to fit their intelligence span, having nothing to give. I have spoken to fast, please forgive me although I still maintain the idea this site was more interesting then before. But what can you do.
(Me)
Am I wrong or did you just say that if you are a regular on this site, then you have a lot of time to waste? From the number of comments I’ve posted in the last 2 weeks, I’d say I was a regular, so yes this is aimed at me.
-Then it was aimed at you. People do what they want with their time, this doesn’t mean that I would do the same thing, nor do I feel hesitation in telling them what I feel about their actions. I’m not trying control nor help anyone. I’m merely expressing my opinion which purpose is a conversation starter.
(Me) Is this not attacking(sorry, not boring, you said “a time waster) someone for commenting on your post? I’d also say that was pretty well aimed.
-I called the person I was responding to a time waster, not because she was answering my comment but because I had just admitted the idea that she commented on both boring and interesting articles. I consider that if I person is so desperate as to push in their word on an amazingly boring article this is time wasting (and this is just my opinion).
“””You should be ashamed of yourself. A wife, two kids and somehow you're still wasting time posting here. Remember - idleness is the devil's workshop. “””
> > it's entertaining to read the proof of your close mindedness.
(Me)This again seemed pretty well aimed. I again pose the question, where in the above comment is the proof of my closed mindedness? If you are seriously confronting me to an argument, then please argue the points I bring up rather than diverting to this “most of you this…and most of you that”. I too am an individual with my own set of opinions, which are up for debate, but not attacks which lack basis or foundation (and saying that one doesn’t divulge his proof doesn’t count). If you have them, step up to the plate, not resort to one-liners and try to come off witty.
-If it’s you that wrote the comment dressed with 3 quotation marks I’ll try and justify my own comment using this. For me, the words you wrote ad up to this: “please stop posting on this site hypocrite!” understanding this, I have know other choice but to think that no opinion different then the majority holds any place here, which results to close mindedness.
(Me) Who then is this aimed at? I’d say been among the most present recently. If this really isn’t aimed at me, please me more specific and give a list of names so as to avoid this confusion.
P.S. No-one seems to take the comments I direct at you as directed at them, maybe you could take some of your own advice and use 5 or 6 more seconds to think about what the words you are writing mean before hitting the submit button.
I had a 15 minute smoke break and decided to see if you’d reply today. But this is pointless. Who cares how you managed to find time to be here today. What you say when here is the real issue.
-When writing this comment or the article, now I realize that I didn’t know much of what I was talking about. Should have had the maturity to be positively sure of what I said before posting it. For that I apologize, however, I’m not saying I don’t think anything I said was right. You said it was pointless for me to explain myself seeing the large amount of time spent on this site recently. Nevertheless I do feel it was important because had I not justified my actions, it would have been correct to charge me for being the biggest hypocrite alive.
(Me) This is a bit of a cop out. You had “reason” to accuse me? Again, if you’re going to make the accusation, please be prepared to back it up. Off the top of my head, #3, Thread C is a pretty good example.
A piece of advice, why bother with the “hate comments”? Stick to the points being raised and who cares if some people say stupid things?
-Backed up previously on this comment.
(Me) Perhaps it’s not just what you say, but the way in which you present it.
Your notion that anyone who hasn’t “forgotten” the way that you have hasn’t gotten over the cult, is more than a tad condescending. Your notion that some people (again, who?) are polluting the site and turning it into “some unoriginal stupid forum” is also put very condescendingly. The notion that we should “do something better with our time” because some of us are “so present on this site that it’s almost impossible for us to lead fulfilling lives” is quite clearly condescending. I could go on, but I’ll get back to my point.
Debate is one thing, but presented in the emotionally charged, honestly very degrading manner in which you do, you’re bound to get a lot of flak/hate comments from individuals such as myself who feel attacked by your generalizations and what have really come off as declarations that our lives would be so much better/more productive if we would all just be like you.
I respect your difference in opinions, but you could surely stand to work on your presentation so as to get to the point of what you are saying and not demean others unintentionally in the process.
-Once again I apologize for appearing that way. But in my defence let me add: the world of forums is new to me so this is the first time I seriously get involved in this type of site. Physiologically one (a nubie) my be let to think that the words he writes won’t have any consequence on anything important to him, having the knowledge that in this forum he doesn’t know anyone, which leads to the outcome of it not being able to affect in anyway his personal life. One maybe does not fully realize instantly that the people he is arguing with are real, and not virtual. In that effect he may be harsh and may not give much thought to what he types.
This may partially be the reason for my extremism and unthought sentences.
(reply to this comment) |
| | From Oddman
Saturday, March 22, 2008, 04:51
(Agree/Disagree?)
The existence of a "majority" does not logically dictate that the "majority" are closed-minded.
Being closed-minded to the "majority" opinion does not make you open-minded.
The "majority" and "minority" opinions of this community have -thankfully- never truly been quantified.
This is simply another opinion of one who is wasting his time commenting on an "amazingly boring article". Having been away from this site for months, I don't belong to any clique or party, and am largely unaffected by any "majority" opinion that may or may not exist.(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | | | | from therli
Monday, March 17, 2008 - 13:39
 (Agree/Disagree?)
let me show you what i'm talking about
this is some of the recent polls
• Who will win the NBA championship?
• Are you glad John Howard lost the Australian federal election?
• Mitt Romney is a Mormon. Should he win the Republican nomination, would this prevent you from voting for him in 2008?
Who SHOULD be the next US President? –
• Coke Vs. Pepsi
is this really interesting?
(reply to this comment)
| | | | | | | | | | | | | From Seek and ye shall find
Wednesday, March 19, 2008, 09:13
(Agree/Disagree?)
From the homepage:
'Welcome to Moving On -- The website created by and for young adults with parents who joined the religious organization The Family / Children of God. Pull up a chair and stay awhile -- Browse, read, rant, write, whatever.'
From the FAQs:
'2. What is the purpose of this Web site?
The purpose of this web site is twofold:
a. To provide a forum for open and frank discussion on the unique experience of being raised in The Family, on life after the group and how we have adjusted (or not).
b. To connect with real people. The purpose of this web site is also to provide a place to connect with old friends, to make new friends and to find support among those few people who understand the unusual background of someone who was raised in the Family. As such, this web site is ultimately a means to an end and not an end in itself.
The opinions and beliefs of many of the participants vary greatly on almost every topic, which results in frequent and lively debate. This is something that keeps this site interesting. There is no “official” belief that someone must adhere to participate on this web site. All that is asked is the understanding that if we have lived through it, then we know what we are talking about.'
(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | From Samuel
Monday, March 17, 2008, 20:24
(Agree/Disagree?)
You have an unfair bias against these poll questions.
The NBA might not matter to you, but it matters to others who enjoy basketball.
I don't know much about Australia, but I did read in the newspaper that the ruling party in Australia (John Howard's) lost power to the Labor party last year. I have a feeling the question had more to do with the Labor party's win than it had to do with Howard himself. And considering that Australia is a fairly large country, a democracy, and is surrounded by poorer countries, what happens in Australia can make an impact on the rest of the world.
I wrote the next poll. I was curious to see how many people consider the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints a cult, and was curious how many people would take that into consideration.
Who will be the next US President is different from who should be. I would like to see Chuck Norris in the White House. But honestly, he doesn't a chance, especially since he's not running. Jeb Bush is another person that comes to my mind as a promising President. But I don't think he'd win if he ran, as many people are looking for a change from the Bush family. Mitt Romney would have been great, I think, even though I disagree with him on same sex marriage. Marriage is not a federal issue, some of the politicians need to re-read the Tenth Amendment! Powers not expressly given to the federal government are reserved for the STATES!
Coke vs. Pepsi? What's so wrong with that? It's just a poll! Personally, I prefer Pepsi. But here is a good example of something we were not allowed in The Family. How much trouble would we have gotten into, therli, in most homes, for having a debate about whether Coca-Cola or Pepsi was better? Would that have been a single demerit, or a double? Perhaps, if the shepherd was in a really pissy mood there might have even been a demerit in place for simply considering drinking a Coke or a Pepsi. I remember "Aunties" rambling about how bad it was that we had gotten into a habit of bringing store bought lemonade to park fellowships. How insane is that? A couple glasses of (gasp!) over sweetened lemonade is not going to hurt you, you know. Especially if the Press Releases are true and Family homes eat nutritious, well balanced meals most of the time. The poll is a symbol of the freedom that we have now, out of The Family. Coke? Pepsi? How about Coke with rum? Lemonade, or Mike's Hard Lemonade? Iced Tea, or Long Island Iced Tea? No one is going to tell you what to drink, so if it sounds good to you, then enjoy!
My advice to you is to live a little, and don't take everything so seriously. Sit back, open a Coke, and enjoy the site. Just be careful not to spill any on your keyboard.(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | from therli
Monday, March 17, 2008 - 04:32
(Agree/Disagree?)
this site lost it's point. it's become some unoriginal stupid forum. i know i don't have to go on but i think these kind of sites are perfect, unless people like you pollute it
(reply to this comment)
| | | | | | | | | | From vix
Wednesday, March 19, 2008, 03:34
(Agree/Disagree?)
I'm not the person who called you a troll but I will say that when I assume that someone is a troll it's actually a compliment because it means that I can't quite believe that someone could truly be as obtuse/ignorant/boring/unimpressive/etc as the person in question, so I figure they must be putting it on for laughs. But hey, if you're not a troll, well done, you're even more dull than I thought it was possible to be! Yay for you!!
(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | From vix
Monday, March 17, 2008, 14:22
(Agree/Disagree?)
Yaaa... wait a minute, this is getting tedious. Tell you what, keep being hopelessly dull with no redeeming qualities and I'm sure I'll eventually be sufficiently motivated to tell you just how much you irritate me. Or why don't you try (yes, try hard sweetie) to think of something interesting to say instead of going on and on and on about the same bloody thing.
(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | From vix
Wednesday, March 19, 2008, 03:41
(Agree/Disagree?)
What I'm saying, idiot, is why don't you try and dazzle me! Come on, then - If you think you can do so much better, go ahead and think up a starting point for some challenging discourse, speak out about something that actually matters IRL, write an article that offers me something of value. Be the change you want to see. I don't think you can, which is why you spend all your time on petty criticisms rather than actually saying something worthy. But whatever, if whining is your thing I guess that's cool. Shame there's not more to you, though.
(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | | | | From steam
Wednesday, March 19, 2008, 06:38
(Agree/Disagree?)
Sweet therli, at first I was about to blast you because the new wine wasn't doing it for you lately. But TTL he punched through and showed me it was because he had a special plan for you his bride. He said he wanted you to dig into some of my golden oldies articles from my profile and it would be health thy navel and marrow to thy bones. Hanna ba sheba dadebade "and then shall the site materialize into something motivating forever more" PTL! He always punches through! Amen beloved? Amen?(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | From therli
Wednesday, March 19, 2008, 09:18
(Agree/Disagree?)
I’m not trying to tell anyone what to do. All I’m saying is that it would be nicer to do things a certain way. Everyone tries to persuade others to their opinion. And if you think that’s bad, I think it would be better for you to kill yourself.
For example, you’re talking to a group of racist people. You might try to convince them of the absurdity and ludicrousness of their ways. That wouldn’t be wrong although you are trying to make them think like you.
(reply to this comment) |
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | from Caveman
Sunday, March 16, 2008 - 22:10
(Agree/Disagree?)
mE haVe FeW thIng tO teLl yOu:
iF yOu doNt liKe whAt yOu reaD yOu caN maKe cOnverSatIon beTTer by makE inTereStiNg ConVerSatiOn, oR yOu can fucK off. eitheR wOuld bE gOOd.
(reply to this comment)
| from DeeJay
Sunday, March 16, 2008 - 21:39
(Agree/Disagree?)
Sob sob. We're sooooo sorry we're not interesting enough for you. Please forgive us and then go finish jerking off somewhere else please. Your mess is not something that we find interesting either.
(reply to this comment)
| from rainy
Saturday, March 15, 2008 - 16:25
(Agree/Disagree?)
The most boring two articles I've seen on here all year are the last two.
(reply to this comment)
| | | | | | | | | | from The Entertainer
Saturday, March 15, 2008 - 15:18
(Agree/Disagree?)
Yep, it's exciting then boring. There are regulars who are replaced with new regulars. If this comes as a surprise you need to get out more often - the whole world is like that. There is a stated purpose for this web site which does not include entertainment for you.
(reply to this comment)
| | | | | | | from afflick
Saturday, March 15, 2008 - 09:28
(Agree/Disagree?)
I'm not mad. This site is what it is. I don't think we are trying to impress anyone. At least, I know I'm not.
(reply to this comment)
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