Moving On - Children of the Children of God

Please Alf, it dosen't have to be any shocking new doctrine like FFing, or Loving Jesus, but could you please fill our spiritual void with something?
After all, even TF has a new revalation about the Keys, which are only a transparent intelectual rip-off of Tolken's Lord of the Rings.

Dear Alf,
We here on the outside are seriously lacking in new spiritual guideance, and eagerly await you words of wisdom with open hearts, minds, and other bodily orifices.
Since leaving I have been plauged by doubt and spiritual turmoil. My real question is this, when are we going to get some new revalations for our lives?
Please Alf, it dosen't have to be any shocking new doctrine like FFing, or Loving Jesus, but could you please fill our spiritual void with something?
After all, even TF has a new revalation about the Keys, which are only a transparent intelectual rip-off of Tolken's Lord of the Rings.
Anyhow, I'm just a little jealous that my car keys haven't the capability to turn into sowrds (as this would be really handy when walking to my car late at night).
P.S. Just as an after thought, since TF is coming up with all kinds of new Demons to pray against, do you think you could pull some names out of your ass---so that we could form vigil groups to pray against these new demons also?
Your meek and mindless sheep.

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from Alf's sexy secretary
Friday, October 11, 2002 - 15:48
(Agree/Disagree?)
I think you deserve a firm rebuke son! Alf's already given you all the sacred teachings you need, you just need to get off your ass and start practicing what he preaches! If he were there I'd sure he'd tie you to your bed and beat you with his cane. How dare you make these kind of demands on the prophet!?
(reply to this comment)

From Al-Keda Series
Friday, October 11, 2002, 16:31
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Really, son! Don't you remember the righteous anger of the rearEnd-Time Prophet when I said "We're all hoping for another talk"? You must be a glutton for punishment. Why don't you just watch a rerun instead of wanting all-new episodes all the time. You know good and well there is no good reason to be bored with the Letters!!!Lord help you. If you think things are getting repetitive (think Kill Khomeini kill Khomeini Kill Khomeini), just try to vary the pitch/volume/tone, or maybe you can be mentally loving Jesus, counting hungry sheep, I don't know, figure something out. Deal with it. Get the Victory. Snap out of it. Rebuke the Devil! Get on The Wall!! Be on Guard!!! OK, I can't remember any more slogans. Bye. GBAKYACTMYABTMYSOB.(reply to this comment)

From Anthony
Monday, October 14, 2002, 21:51
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"Al-Keda", how clever, nice touch, whoever you are!(reply to this comment)